yes, so it has been nearly five months since i last posted. completely unintentional. i wasn't busy so much as trying to stay busy, i suppose. there were bouts of busy-ness in there. maybe three or four.
kind of ruminating about whether i should start another web presence. i arrived at an idea yesterday about blogging about wedding planning, not because the world needs another wedding blog (and when has that ever stopped a girl from blogging about her wedding?) but because some people honestly don't know where to start, and some of those people i know personally, and a lot of times i am one. also, i am the wedding anti-christ and i am still going to have a wedding, which i thought might be fun to write about. (notice how i didn't say read about?)
i took down my personal work portfolio a few months ago because my dreamhost subscription ran out and i have been mildly aware that posting full stories online really just invites plagiarism. i also just wasn't into seeing how stale my work was becoming.
so why a web presence? i like to blog, first and foremost. and second, this blog is mostly a secret or a url that many people have forgotten, and i like it that way, but i do want a website i can send to potential clients or whathaveyou that won't reveal how i feel about lentils or how many times i can use the word, FUCK, in a post.
when i talk to friends or chat with former classmates online, i tend to get this sort of proxy wistfulness. like, CAROLYN, you are such a good writer, you should actually be doing shit. that essentially functions to make me feel like a lazy turd, or a failure. i haven't gotten a real job here, and therefore am a turd. AND a failure, i guess. but maybe blogging would give me a sense of purpose? i don't know. it probably won't.
what i would like to do is put out some online essays about china. one reason is because china is crazy. another reason is because i live in china and that consumes most aspects of my life. so i'm kind of considering that, as well. what makes me hesitant is that there is so much out there on china right now, and it kind of falls under either "rabid china news coverage" or "personal china experience" when i don't really want to do either, wholly.
1 comment:
1) I will not cede the title of "wedding anti-christ" to you, though I will consider sharing it.
2) I can host any type of web site you want for free. Sometimes it helps to just start it and figure it out as you go. Just a thought.
3) In the meantime, "FUCK" all you want. :)
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