drance! so cute. with jason in the background
another wedding photo - at abbey road this time. what's with the shit on my eye.
Sunday, July 22, 2007
saturday
sorry, picture quality's kinda booty, but they're the only ones we have from last night. from art scene for ava's goodbye party to a brief stint at eager beaver, and then at abbey road for the rest of the night.
drance! so cute. with jason in the background
another wedding photo - at abbey road this time. what's with the shit on my eye.
drance! so cute. with jason in the background
another wedding photo - at abbey road this time. what's with the shit on my eye.
Friday, July 20, 2007
the morning after the morning after
just up and watching gladiator for the 50th time. such a good movie, amazing score. i love the battle scene in the opening... probably my favorite scene in a movie, ever. when cyn and i went to see it in the theater, way back when, we were standing up and cheering during the fight scenes. my sister thought we were sick; she was nearly nauseous from the goriness.
last night was interesting. as always, i set out with the intention of hanging out for a bit, then coming home before 1 and going to bed. as always, i get deterred. met up with steph and a random crew at constellation. that place is just amazing. i love it. i love that i can space out my drinks with big glasses of oolong on ice. they make proper drinks, and bring both shaker and chilled glass to the table to pour in front of you. i tried to order a stoli greyhound, but ended up with cranberry juice instead, which steph dubbed the 'UTI cocktail.' drew was there, a recently-arrived brit, duncan, was there, and gary from the lab. we waited and waited for albert and scott - still at work - to show up, but after a couple of hours, i was overdue at de la coast and needing a change of scenery. so off i went.
dan's second night of grown & sexy was quiet. typical, sherry says, of a weekly party. they take a while to ramp up. adam was there, plus his absolutely beautiful friend patience, and this guy duane that we met a while back at velvet, whose insistence on sherry and i 'checkin for the brothers' and placing his hand on the small of my back wears very very thin, very very quickly. i'm not a fan, and both sherry and i give me credit for not expressing myself very carolyn-style and telling him to get his sweaty fucking hands off of me. i do it for the sake of the social situation; he's friends with patience who is dear friends with adam, whom i think is a doll and of course is a good friend of sherry's. and so the molestation continues. there's something really unpleasant about A: a man who is continuously sweating, B: a man who is constantly checking out your ass, and C: a man who leaves copious amounts of saliva on your face when he kisses your cheek, which you didn't ask for in the first place. *shudder*
oh yes, and speaking of sherry:
http://www.smartshanghai.com/blog/756/My_Weekender_shanghai#more
go, mami!
gregor was also there with his 'assistant,' chi, a very beautiful girl that we are hoping he'll hook up with. what? she's hot.
they give you a bowl of peaches and cream when you show up at grown & sexy, which i think is a cute idea. roses, everywhere. it's hilarious.
last night was interesting. as always, i set out with the intention of hanging out for a bit, then coming home before 1 and going to bed. as always, i get deterred. met up with steph and a random crew at constellation. that place is just amazing. i love it. i love that i can space out my drinks with big glasses of oolong on ice. they make proper drinks, and bring both shaker and chilled glass to the table to pour in front of you. i tried to order a stoli greyhound, but ended up with cranberry juice instead, which steph dubbed the 'UTI cocktail.' drew was there, a recently-arrived brit, duncan, was there, and gary from the lab. we waited and waited for albert and scott - still at work - to show up, but after a couple of hours, i was overdue at de la coast and needing a change of scenery. so off i went.
dan's second night of grown & sexy was quiet. typical, sherry says, of a weekly party. they take a while to ramp up. adam was there, plus his absolutely beautiful friend patience, and this guy duane that we met a while back at velvet, whose insistence on sherry and i 'checkin for the brothers' and placing his hand on the small of my back wears very very thin, very very quickly. i'm not a fan, and both sherry and i give me credit for not expressing myself very carolyn-style and telling him to get his sweaty fucking hands off of me. i do it for the sake of the social situation; he's friends with patience who is dear friends with adam, whom i think is a doll and of course is a good friend of sherry's. and so the molestation continues. there's something really unpleasant about A: a man who is continuously sweating, B: a man who is constantly checking out your ass, and C: a man who leaves copious amounts of saliva on your face when he kisses your cheek, which you didn't ask for in the first place. *shudder*
oh yes, and speaking of sherry:
http://www.smartshanghai.com/blog/756/My_Weekender_shanghai#more
go, mami!
gregor was also there with his 'assistant,' chi, a very beautiful girl that we are hoping he'll hook up with. what? she's hot.
they give you a bowl of peaches and cream when you show up at grown & sexy, which i think is a cute idea. roses, everywhere. it's hilarious.
and... trying to keep the food down
heroes status: disk 8
tummy status: recovering
this just goes to prove that i'm not lying about facebook; people from back in the day continue to find you. daily. but whatever, it's a voluntary thing and i can certainly voluntarily take myself off of it. sure. but it also proves that violence solves nothing. after many many years of punching this individual in the solar plexus for sharing with me a number of delights throughout junior high and high school and college - namely, the wet willie, sneaking up behind me and blowing in my ear (we were in college, mind you), and tickling me in undesirable places - he continues to do obnoxious things like FIND me on stupid facebook. i'm not your friend, dude. i've hated you since i was 12. i know i'm harboring bad feelings from a verrrry long time ago, but after a enduring years of wet willies, i'm entitled.
anyhoo. on to more important things.
talked to moms today. and my sister. i love that our convos are punctuated with my sister screaming at my cat, 'get OFF me, you fucking whore! i'm going to slap you into next week!' good looking out. sounds like my baby is getting the upbringing i always wanted for her. apparently she got locked out of the house overnight for galloping over to my sister and munching on her forefinger. i don't know what to say - i thought scarlett would outgrow that. apparently she hasn't. it's the love, tho. she follows my sister around everywhere, and shows her affection by mauling her ass. isn't that how everyone functions? wait, maybe that's just us.
tummy status: recovering
this just goes to prove that i'm not lying about facebook; people from back in the day continue to find you. daily. but whatever, it's a voluntary thing and i can certainly voluntarily take myself off of it. sure. but it also proves that violence solves nothing. after many many years of punching this individual in the solar plexus for sharing with me a number of delights throughout junior high and high school and college - namely, the wet willie, sneaking up behind me and blowing in my ear (we were in college, mind you), and tickling me in undesirable places - he continues to do obnoxious things like FIND me on stupid facebook. i'm not your friend, dude. i've hated you since i was 12. i know i'm harboring bad feelings from a verrrry long time ago, but after a enduring years of wet willies, i'm entitled.anyhoo. on to more important things.
talked to moms today. and my sister. i love that our convos are punctuated with my sister screaming at my cat, 'get OFF me, you fucking whore! i'm going to slap you into next week!' good looking out. sounds like my baby is getting the upbringing i always wanted for her. apparently she got locked out of the house overnight for galloping over to my sister and munching on her forefinger. i don't know what to say - i thought scarlett would outgrow that. apparently she hasn't. it's the love, tho. she follows my sister around everywhere, and shows her affection by mauling her ass. isn't that how everyone functions? wait, maybe that's just us.
Thursday, July 19, 2007
trying to keep the faith
home all day. sick and disgusting. actually ended up going to finestre with kayi for dinner... we've been planning it and i really wanted to go. the food was surprisingly good (better than jean georges, actually. wha...?) and i should have expected it, but a full meal doesn't go down nicely when your stomach is up in arms (get it? haha)
people be finding me on facebook. people from a while back, and waaaay back. a tad frightening sometimes. finding out so-and-so (whom you barely spoke to in high school anyway) is married with three kids? three? damn. and then there are those that aren't as historical, but could've just left well enough alone. me, that is. leave me alone.
anyway. nothing interesting tonight. a whole lotta blabber blabber from us girls. life... argh. so complicated. maybe it'd be easier if i was an autobot and got told what to do. or, shit, i don't know. i love my freedoms and i love my friends, but occasionally life suffers from being under the microscope. the scrutiny shuts down the purpose. aka, look too hard, and something's bound to displease you. just try to go with the flow, hang out, enjoy things, don't think too hard. thinking and overthinking are society's current downfall when it comes to social interaction.
what the hell am i spouting off about now?
i kinda doubt i'm going i tomorrow - not fit for public interaction - but when the alarm goes off, we'll see. have a happy friday, everyone.
people be finding me on facebook. people from a while back, and waaaay back. a tad frightening sometimes. finding out so-and-so (whom you barely spoke to in high school anyway) is married with three kids? three? damn. and then there are those that aren't as historical, but could've just left well enough alone. me, that is. leave me alone.
anyway. nothing interesting tonight. a whole lotta blabber blabber from us girls. life... argh. so complicated. maybe it'd be easier if i was an autobot and got told what to do. or, shit, i don't know. i love my freedoms and i love my friends, but occasionally life suffers from being under the microscope. the scrutiny shuts down the purpose. aka, look too hard, and something's bound to displease you. just try to go with the flow, hang out, enjoy things, don't think too hard. thinking and overthinking are society's current downfall when it comes to social interaction.
what the hell am i spouting off about now?
i kinda doubt i'm going i tomorrow - not fit for public interaction - but when the alarm goes off, we'll see. have a happy friday, everyone.
Wednesday, July 18, 2007
small pieces
...and covered in glass.
today i sat all day in the office and worked. god knows how i used to dive headfirst into spreadsheets and emerge hours later, not even knowing what time it was. i nearly went insane around 3 pm when i finished my only meeting of the day and realized that i couldn't go somewhere else. boo.
jen is in town overnight, so she stopped by on her way from the airport and kicked it. dinner, heroes season 1, and rochford pinot. can't complain. i scrouged up a random dinner for myself because just noodles wasn't cutting it for me today. in the canteen/cafeteria, i tend to starve rather than eat unidentifiable meats, so lunch consists of random oily vegetable and some rice and a yogurt. i couldn't do just starch for another meal so i made eggs and ate about a pound of olives. jen observed astutely that my theme was oval-shaped foods.
i try to eat the employee lunch because i want to act like an employee, but i think i reached my limit today. one can only be served chicken neck so often. bund brewery is around the corner and i've cajoled jason into consenting to eat with me on occasion. i figure with christine every so often, maybe jason once every couple weeks, and maybe, just maybe if kayi can get off her ass and get to work around noon one day a month, i might even have company. and we are excited about this.
lunch used to be such a social thing. it's ok, tho. i actually don't mind sort of bolting food down and going back to work. i don't lose momentum that way. i eat later than pretty much the entire office, so i get about 30 minutes of quiet when the clock strikes 12:00:01 and everyone jams downstairs. it's all worth it. i just miss my good embarcadero lunch places. the ferry building. hog island oysters. mijita. tlaloc. lightening. the ghetto pizza joint. boudin's. taylor's refresher. slanted door. miette for a macaroon. ciao bella for peach sorbet. peet's for a post-lunch pick-me-up. and the incredibly overpriced organic farmers' market on tuesdays and thursdays where the grassfed beef burger guy and the vegetarian tamale lady always are. and i really miss globe in all of its deafening wonder.
we do miss our food.
at one point jen, cyn, and i were all sitting around the dining table with our various forms of entertainment - jen and her laptop, me and my non-peeling hardboiled egg, cyn with her... wine, i guess. i lay my head down on the table (avoiding shells and my salt pile) and watched us. like pulling out of yourself and watching the whole scene. this is all going to change so soon; we best enjoy every second now. you should try it for a second, just do a freeze frame and look around you and fucking appreciate what's going on. even if you're doing what i was last night and running around xin tian di, trying not to assault people (how so un-yogi of me); one day i think i'll look back and remember scanning wildly around the gray brick buildings, hot as hell, wearing half a yoga outfit, talking to sherry on the phone, nearly in tears of frustration because of the day i was having. even that counts.
today i sat all day in the office and worked. god knows how i used to dive headfirst into spreadsheets and emerge hours later, not even knowing what time it was. i nearly went insane around 3 pm when i finished my only meeting of the day and realized that i couldn't go somewhere else. boo.
jen is in town overnight, so she stopped by on her way from the airport and kicked it. dinner, heroes season 1, and rochford pinot. can't complain. i scrouged up a random dinner for myself because just noodles wasn't cutting it for me today. in the canteen/cafeteria, i tend to starve rather than eat unidentifiable meats, so lunch consists of random oily vegetable and some rice and a yogurt. i couldn't do just starch for another meal so i made eggs and ate about a pound of olives. jen observed astutely that my theme was oval-shaped foods.
i try to eat the employee lunch because i want to act like an employee, but i think i reached my limit today. one can only be served chicken neck so often. bund brewery is around the corner and i've cajoled jason into consenting to eat with me on occasion. i figure with christine every so often, maybe jason once every couple weeks, and maybe, just maybe if kayi can get off her ass and get to work around noon one day a month, i might even have company. and we are excited about this.
lunch used to be such a social thing. it's ok, tho. i actually don't mind sort of bolting food down and going back to work. i don't lose momentum that way. i eat later than pretty much the entire office, so i get about 30 minutes of quiet when the clock strikes 12:00:01 and everyone jams downstairs. it's all worth it. i just miss my good embarcadero lunch places. the ferry building. hog island oysters. mijita. tlaloc. lightening. the ghetto pizza joint. boudin's. taylor's refresher. slanted door. miette for a macaroon. ciao bella for peach sorbet. peet's for a post-lunch pick-me-up. and the incredibly overpriced organic farmers' market on tuesdays and thursdays where the grassfed beef burger guy and the vegetarian tamale lady always are. and i really miss globe in all of its deafening wonder.
we do miss our food.
at one point jen, cyn, and i were all sitting around the dining table with our various forms of entertainment - jen and her laptop, me and my non-peeling hardboiled egg, cyn with her... wine, i guess. i lay my head down on the table (avoiding shells and my salt pile) and watched us. like pulling out of yourself and watching the whole scene. this is all going to change so soon; we best enjoy every second now. you should try it for a second, just do a freeze frame and look around you and fucking appreciate what's going on. even if you're doing what i was last night and running around xin tian di, trying not to assault people (how so un-yogi of me); one day i think i'll look back and remember scanning wildly around the gray brick buildings, hot as hell, wearing half a yoga outfit, talking to sherry on the phone, nearly in tears of frustration because of the day i was having. even that counts.
Tuesday, July 17, 2007
intimidator transformer
at one point during the night, jason turned to me mid-story and was like, 'you know you're really scary, right? like, one of the most intimidating people on this planet.'
uh, no, actually. i thought i left that all behind in my callow and misspent youth. that was kind of sad for me to hear - i make an effort (okay, sometimes) to appear non-scary and friendly and all that shit, but i think people see through my act. the bluntness, the directness, the inability (and disinterest) in bullshitting. i invest time in meeting a person and getting to know them and i want depth. like, immediately. if you're going to bullshit me or smalltalk me, depending on how i feel about you in general, i'll either tune you out completely and you cease to exist, or i get the tunnel vision of feeling pressured in a social situation and start to do erratic and odd things. like completely lose my personality and warp into this oatmeal-mush-super-lame person. ugh. how we want to avoid that.
so i'm in bed at 11:23 and i take that to be a good sign. kayi and i hit up our cantonese mothership, hengshan cafe, and had a wonderful, soulful meal that our moms didn't make but could've. okay, maybe not that good, but it was decent enough. having canto food rights the world, sets it back on its feet, restores me. i got dinged at my attempt to attend a yoga class again for reasons i refuse to disclose but ended up lecturing the reception about for approximately 4.2 minutes. plus my stupid membership expired today so now i have to figure out where the hell i'm going to be living soon so i can decide what to do. back pain dictates yoga and not a gym, but now there are a ton of options once i'm free of living in the burbs. decisions, decisions.
spent the first 5-ish hours of my day at the studio in a meeting. yes, singular. they do quite the marathon meeting, my company folk. then in the car on the way to the office, i apparently decided that the world had enough of me and treated christine to an unconscious version of me. she was probably glad for the quiet, as i'd been babbling about program names and brand identity and consistency all damn morning. maybe she roofie'd me to get me to shut up. whatever. at any rate, i woke up and briefly panicked about having been asleep, then rolled my head the other direction and slept until we pulled up on the bund. sometimes i do thank god for traffic.
and now we sleep.
uh, no, actually. i thought i left that all behind in my callow and misspent youth. that was kind of sad for me to hear - i make an effort (okay, sometimes) to appear non-scary and friendly and all that shit, but i think people see through my act. the bluntness, the directness, the inability (and disinterest) in bullshitting. i invest time in meeting a person and getting to know them and i want depth. like, immediately. if you're going to bullshit me or smalltalk me, depending on how i feel about you in general, i'll either tune you out completely and you cease to exist, or i get the tunnel vision of feeling pressured in a social situation and start to do erratic and odd things. like completely lose my personality and warp into this oatmeal-mush-super-lame person. ugh. how we want to avoid that.
so i'm in bed at 11:23 and i take that to be a good sign. kayi and i hit up our cantonese mothership, hengshan cafe, and had a wonderful, soulful meal that our moms didn't make but could've. okay, maybe not that good, but it was decent enough. having canto food rights the world, sets it back on its feet, restores me. i got dinged at my attempt to attend a yoga class again for reasons i refuse to disclose but ended up lecturing the reception about for approximately 4.2 minutes. plus my stupid membership expired today so now i have to figure out where the hell i'm going to be living soon so i can decide what to do. back pain dictates yoga and not a gym, but now there are a ton of options once i'm free of living in the burbs. decisions, decisions.
spent the first 5-ish hours of my day at the studio in a meeting. yes, singular. they do quite the marathon meeting, my company folk. then in the car on the way to the office, i apparently decided that the world had enough of me and treated christine to an unconscious version of me. she was probably glad for the quiet, as i'd been babbling about program names and brand identity and consistency all damn morning. maybe she roofie'd me to get me to shut up. whatever. at any rate, i woke up and briefly panicked about having been asleep, then rolled my head the other direction and slept until we pulled up on the bund. sometimes i do thank god for traffic.
and now we sleep.
Monday, July 16, 2007
rip dat shit
hilarity always ensues when you get home on a monday night and kate's at the dinner table, cyn's made a big batch of pasta, and jason's on the way. at one point jason and i were talking and i looked behind him into the kitchen to see my roommate - who's belting out a rendition of purple rain as i type - freaking the dog. full-on flippin-the-griddle spanking kodi. too funny.
i was a little sad earlier because my meeting kept right on through, all up in my yoga time and everything, but coming home made it all better.
what the fuck are we going to do when the band breaks up? i'm moving soon, cyn's prolly moving at some point. so sad.
here's a pic from saturday with part of the dude armada. do cyn and i not look like we're newlyweds and shit? it's our wedding photo.
i was a little sad earlier because my meeting kept right on through, all up in my yoga time and everything, but coming home made it all better.
what the fuck are we going to do when the band breaks up? i'm moving soon, cyn's prolly moving at some point. so sad.
here's a pic from saturday with part of the dude armada. do cyn and i not look like we're newlyweds and shit? it's our wedding photo.
Sunday, July 15, 2007
doing the nod
sometimes things are just ok. like, maybe your day didn't go extraordinarily well, but something about how you felt about everything made it just fine. i'm having one of those moments, where i think part of my day could be fairly assessed as having sucked (not the evening, thank you), but i'm for some reason totally fine. like, content.
had a birthday dinner tonight at jean georges, which was nice. my first foray into the SH location - the space is beautiful, but my socks were still on after the meal. still, fine. whatever. not every joint can be aqua or globe or even in 'n out. decided to head out and meet sherry with company at sasha's for a quick drink. i could've easily gone home to fall on my face, but sometimes you need to space things out, give yourself time to digest and evaluate., see your good friends and have a giggle.
honestly, right now as i try to keep my eyes open, i'm wishing i was asleep already as this weekend was really not the most restful, but things just happen as they happen and i refuse to turn into the corporate monster i used to be. if it means i'm lame and exhausted tomorrow, fine. but at least i'm not aggro crazy person sweating shit all the time. i'm ok with it right now, tired as hell, more than a little confused about life and where we should end up, but surprisingly okay about the present state of my random little life.
did your grandma ever make sun tea?
had a birthday dinner tonight at jean georges, which was nice. my first foray into the SH location - the space is beautiful, but my socks were still on after the meal. still, fine. whatever. not every joint can be aqua or globe or even in 'n out. decided to head out and meet sherry with company at sasha's for a quick drink. i could've easily gone home to fall on my face, but sometimes you need to space things out, give yourself time to digest and evaluate., see your good friends and have a giggle.
honestly, right now as i try to keep my eyes open, i'm wishing i was asleep already as this weekend was really not the most restful, but things just happen as they happen and i refuse to turn into the corporate monster i used to be. if it means i'm lame and exhausted tomorrow, fine. but at least i'm not aggro crazy person sweating shit all the time. i'm ok with it right now, tired as hell, more than a little confused about life and where we should end up, but surprisingly okay about the present state of my random little life.
did your grandma ever make sun tea?
Saturday, July 14, 2007
ridiculous tired
when i was in college, i remember just being so busy all of the time. studying, working, sports, family, friends, parties. i didn't do a lot of the stereotypical slacker gen-x shit, i guess because there just wasn't time. at one point i went to the doctor for this fucked-up permacough, and i mentioned frequent blackouts or grayouts, sometime while standing, sometimes while getting up. i was house-sitting once and studying on the sofa and got up to do something, then woke up i think when my head hit the hardwood floor. i remember thinking, what the hell just hit me on the head? my doctor just said, 'i think it's just that you're burning the candle at both ends. try to take it easy.'
that's cool. thanks, doc.
so i decided it was time to quit my job last year when i blacked out briefly on an escalator and nearly took the entire BART commuter crowd with me. at least i think that's what happened. falling out of your shoes and waking up with your face on a grater-like escalator step is a good indicator that you need a break. this time, i listened, and it was lovely. just great.
why, though? there are tons of people who work much harder and longer and i dare say don't do the same, rather embarrassing, potentially dangerous, dramatic tumbles to the ground. it's a weakness.
so, with the new jay-oh-bee, one of the ends of the candle will eventually need to be extinguished. seeing the sun rise and then having to think coherently a few hours later do not mix. the first couple of days, fine. but it's been around 2 weeks and i'm starting to feel the mental awning start to draw over my 360 degree world. (although i will venture to say that falling down an escalator in china might actually be a better experience than in the states - there's no sense of space here, so the people are pretty packed in and will probably make for a nice, squishy landing. but i'm not planning on doing that again, so i suppose my theory will go untested.)
that's cool. thanks, doc.
so i decided it was time to quit my job last year when i blacked out briefly on an escalator and nearly took the entire BART commuter crowd with me. at least i think that's what happened. falling out of your shoes and waking up with your face on a grater-like escalator step is a good indicator that you need a break. this time, i listened, and it was lovely. just great.
why, though? there are tons of people who work much harder and longer and i dare say don't do the same, rather embarrassing, potentially dangerous, dramatic tumbles to the ground. it's a weakness.
so, with the new jay-oh-bee, one of the ends of the candle will eventually need to be extinguished. seeing the sun rise and then having to think coherently a few hours later do not mix. the first couple of days, fine. but it's been around 2 weeks and i'm starting to feel the mental awning start to draw over my 360 degree world. (although i will venture to say that falling down an escalator in china might actually be a better experience than in the states - there's no sense of space here, so the people are pretty packed in and will probably make for a nice, squishy landing. but i'm not planning on doing that again, so i suppose my theory will go untested.)
Friday, July 13, 2007
this ain't a buffet, kit
all day at the studio today. i kind of love how randomly i can work, for i am pretty random. after training at the store this morning i headed over to the studio for a meeting which went way long, then laris came in and kinda sat in on our meeting and weighed in on our branding strategy. i spent the rest of the day parked at some random workstation, finishing things and revising things and using the hell out of thesaurus.com.
getting a taxi didn't quite work out so i didn't get home till late, and i missed out on dinner with steph and albert and crew, as well as wharton people (second option). i got home super grumpy and starving and tired, altho i have to say i rallied nicely. you have to - dan's party was tonight, opening night, gotta show the love, right? so i thought i would swing by volar first to see steph and albert, which turned out to be a marathon stay because cyn was already there, jason was there, and kate showed up, and chris is in town from seoul-slash-philly, and it was all over. i didn't make it to de la coast until after sherry'd left and dan was hanging by a thread. bad girl. i was supposed to head into the office tomorrow for some stuff, but when i got home i got cancelled on and yes we were overjoyed.
so now i'm free to post-club procrastinate. one of my favorite things in the world.
i know i have to chill with the fly fishing pics, but allen just sent his over and i can't stop laughing. we look like humpty dumpties.
keep losing consciousness so will go to sleep now.
getting a taxi didn't quite work out so i didn't get home till late, and i missed out on dinner with steph and albert and crew, as well as wharton people (second option). i got home super grumpy and starving and tired, altho i have to say i rallied nicely. you have to - dan's party was tonight, opening night, gotta show the love, right? so i thought i would swing by volar first to see steph and albert, which turned out to be a marathon stay because cyn was already there, jason was there, and kate showed up, and chris is in town from seoul-slash-philly, and it was all over. i didn't make it to de la coast until after sherry'd left and dan was hanging by a thread. bad girl. i was supposed to head into the office tomorrow for some stuff, but when i got home i got cancelled on and yes we were overjoyed.
so now i'm free to post-club procrastinate. one of my favorite things in the world.
i know i have to chill with the fly fishing pics, but allen just sent his over and i can't stop laughing. we look like humpty dumpties.
keep losing consciousness so will go to sleep now.
Thursday, July 12, 2007
okay....
worked till late then headed to kate's for the 'grand opening' of a nice red that she's been saving, which we drank while i ate a random dinner from her fridge as we waited for cyn to arrive. kate lives in some back alley that's ridiculous to find, but her little place is comfy and we watched her friend's cat gallop around the joint in between eating, drinking, and exclaiming.
there's been a lot of that this week, exclaiming. the ladies have been schlumping around, miserable balls of shit for the most part. not a good collective week for us. i've been a relative ball of shit, probably not too miserable but definitely pretty exhausted (go to sleep why don't you) and not having time to eat proper meals and such. i swear one of these days, i'm going to get a schedule. i've been doing a lot of yogurt because it's fast and comes in a bottle and i can chug whilst moving about, and i feel like the danone brand here is ok and not chock full of antifreeze or whatever. tonight i picked at some food that kate's ayi made for her and had about 4 glasses of wine, a beer in the cab, and a cranberry vodka. liquor does not a meal make. i can already hear the little mom that sits on my right shoulder complaining about my habits. seriously, i'll get a schedule, i swear. and i'll stuff some food in it somewhere.
went to the lingerie & me 'fashion show' at mao... why are fashion shows here never really fashion shows? tonight the girls would pose one at a time in this giant birdcage, which we couldn't see from the mezzanine thing where cyn's cousin's wharton friends had booked a table. i mean, i'm no voyeur, but it is nice to see a well-executed fashion show.
okay, really now. going to sleep.
there's been a lot of that this week, exclaiming. the ladies have been schlumping around, miserable balls of shit for the most part. not a good collective week for us. i've been a relative ball of shit, probably not too miserable but definitely pretty exhausted (go to sleep why don't you) and not having time to eat proper meals and such. i swear one of these days, i'm going to get a schedule. i've been doing a lot of yogurt because it's fast and comes in a bottle and i can chug whilst moving about, and i feel like the danone brand here is ok and not chock full of antifreeze or whatever. tonight i picked at some food that kate's ayi made for her and had about 4 glasses of wine, a beer in the cab, and a cranberry vodka. liquor does not a meal make. i can already hear the little mom that sits on my right shoulder complaining about my habits. seriously, i'll get a schedule, i swear. and i'll stuff some food in it somewhere.
went to the lingerie & me 'fashion show' at mao... why are fashion shows here never really fashion shows? tonight the girls would pose one at a time in this giant birdcage, which we couldn't see from the mezzanine thing where cyn's cousin's wharton friends had booked a table. i mean, i'm no voyeur, but it is nice to see a well-executed fashion show.
okay, really now. going to sleep.
Wednesday, July 11, 2007
peaches
pick peaches lick peaches sick peaches georgia peaches peach fuzz peaches and cream, baby. peaches and herb, don't you know.
i'm listening to peaches in case you haven't caught on. that girl is nasty. how the hell is she from canada. i had to go get that khia song just because... that's my fuggin club track. anybody who drops that during a night gets the thumbs up from yours truly.
ding!
planning mi viaje a bali con mi hermana.... we're thinking of staying at nusa dua, not kuta. i don't need to get my club on when on vacay since i live in like, the clubbing capital. i'm not trying to get blown to pieces. alvin sent me the most hirarious email with recommendations for areas and hotels... and pork.
"if u'd like to stay on the mountain area, go to UBUD
it's about 1 1/2 hour drive from kuta and nusa dua
they have nice hotels and villas, but i'v never stayed there
the most important thing:
no matter what u do, no matter where u stay, u have to, u MUST go to
BABI GULING IBU OKA in UBUD
babi guling in indonesian means suckling pig, ibu means mother, oka is
the name of the person who owns the place
i'm not kidding, the best pork u'll ever taste in your life
it's greasy, it's fatty, the skin is crunchy, the meat is tender .. oh
my my .. i'm drooling now .. sorry ...
forget paulaner's pork knuckle, forget german's nurnberger sausages,
forget those filthy bacons..."
lmao. gotta love alvin. he has his priorities.
i had the big booty mean-ass yoga teacher again tonight. i think it's her schtick, she kinda goes there, like unnecessarily rude to people, but whatevs. she's a good instructor - good corrections. i always learn something new in her class, that's good. she can fuggin scream at people all she wants. you sweat like a mother in her class, tho.
slippery sailors.
is it wednesday already? thursday, technically. the week's flying.
nighty night.
i'm listening to peaches in case you haven't caught on. that girl is nasty. how the hell is she from canada. i had to go get that khia song just because... that's my fuggin club track. anybody who drops that during a night gets the thumbs up from yours truly.
ding!
planning mi viaje a bali con mi hermana.... we're thinking of staying at nusa dua, not kuta. i don't need to get my club on when on vacay since i live in like, the clubbing capital. i'm not trying to get blown to pieces. alvin sent me the most hirarious email with recommendations for areas and hotels... and pork.
"if u'd like to stay on the mountain area, go to UBUD
it's about 1 1/2 hour drive from kuta and nusa dua
they have nice hotels and villas, but i'v never stayed there
the most important thing:
no matter what u do, no matter where u stay, u have to, u MUST go to
BABI GULING IBU OKA in UBUD
babi guling in indonesian means suckling pig, ibu means mother, oka is
the name of the person who owns the place
i'm not kidding, the best pork u'll ever taste in your life
it's greasy, it's fatty, the skin is crunchy, the meat is tender .. oh
my my .. i'm drooling now .. sorry ...
forget paulaner's pork knuckle, forget german's nurnberger sausages,
forget those filthy bacons..."
lmao. gotta love alvin. he has his priorities.
i had the big booty mean-ass yoga teacher again tonight. i think it's her schtick, she kinda goes there, like unnecessarily rude to people, but whatevs. she's a good instructor - good corrections. i always learn something new in her class, that's good. she can fuggin scream at people all she wants. you sweat like a mother in her class, tho.
slippery sailors.
is it wednesday already? thursday, technically. the week's flying.
nighty night.
Tuesday, July 10, 2007
all hyper
waiting for the melatonin to kick in.
cindy's auntie betty and uncle ron were in town, so we met up with them and about 7 of their closest friends at ye shanghai. a nice little surprise (i thought we were 'stopping by') since it turned into dinner and not just drinks and chat. always nice to see the family. we're just about related anyhow.
then back to the bund for the soft opening (allegedly) of the new brewery. looks really nice inside and out. we had a giggle with kate and now i'm home, waiting to sleep.
i think when i shut my eyes, it'll be fine. usually is. i like to pretend blogging winds me down, but it's just an indulgence, really.
today was long. long long long. pouring-ass rain for a while, thankfully i was at the studio and not running around in it. the studio environment is so nice; i think i could get used to being there, altho i need some quieter shoes. the wooden floors both at the studio and the office echo with the slightest noise, so i try to shuffle around on my tip toes instead of constantly announcing my presence. everyone's so nice, they sit around and have lunch together and chit chat. it's so gracious and normal. the head designer-guy (sooo cool) even rocked the flip flops with his dressy clothes for the photo. my white havaianas got the up-and-down from the pseudo singaporean today and he made some comment about me wearing 'comfortable slippers.' every day, a comment from that one. one-man peanut gallery.
may need to shoot to hk on a weekend for some shoe shopping and family-visiting?
cindy's auntie betty and uncle ron were in town, so we met up with them and about 7 of their closest friends at ye shanghai. a nice little surprise (i thought we were 'stopping by') since it turned into dinner and not just drinks and chat. always nice to see the family. we're just about related anyhow.
then back to the bund for the soft opening (allegedly) of the new brewery. looks really nice inside and out. we had a giggle with kate and now i'm home, waiting to sleep.
i think when i shut my eyes, it'll be fine. usually is. i like to pretend blogging winds me down, but it's just an indulgence, really.
today was long. long long long. pouring-ass rain for a while, thankfully i was at the studio and not running around in it. the studio environment is so nice; i think i could get used to being there, altho i need some quieter shoes. the wooden floors both at the studio and the office echo with the slightest noise, so i try to shuffle around on my tip toes instead of constantly announcing my presence. everyone's so nice, they sit around and have lunch together and chit chat. it's so gracious and normal. the head designer-guy (sooo cool) even rocked the flip flops with his dressy clothes for the photo. my white havaianas got the up-and-down from the pseudo singaporean today and he made some comment about me wearing 'comfortable slippers.' every day, a comment from that one. one-man peanut gallery.
may need to shoot to hk on a weekend for some shoe shopping and family-visiting?
Monday, July 09, 2007
whirlwinds
met the ladies out for din din, which was nice. a little monday celebration that included pizza and asparagus and prosciutto. can't beat that with a bat.
jason was at cotton's with some friends, so we cabbed over, had a fairly brief and uneventful drink, and came home.
and now my eyelids are falling.
tomorrow is full of meetings and bouncing between the studio and the office and the store. please please don't rain... we're also taking photos (?) tomorrow so i have to scare something up to wear. crappity jesus.
nighty night.
jason was at cotton's with some friends, so we cabbed over, had a fairly brief and uneventful drink, and came home.
and now my eyelids are falling.
tomorrow is full of meetings and bouncing between the studio and the office and the store. please please don't rain... we're also taking photos (?) tomorrow so i have to scare something up to wear. crappity jesus.
nighty night.
Sunday, July 08, 2007
fill it to the rim
happy days are here again...
not really. not too much has changed in the 5 or so hours it's been since i last posted my most recent self-involved dribble.
yogs was good. i almost died from hangover-ness, but that's what i friggin get. serves me right.
i want the new cormac mccarthy book. and did you know that william gibson was here in june, presenting the intro for a photo exhibit? of course i completely forgot the photographer's name, but i am quite the sad girl for missing mr. gibson in person.
did anyone go to live earth yestiddy? kayi and i had designs on checking out the shanghai concert - which allegedly took place at the base of pearl tower, even tho the ticket promoters said it would be in the stadium - but instead we did stupid drinkfest 2007. ugh. what a waste. the performers - with the exception of sarah brightman or some shit - were all chinese artists, none of which i actually know unless jay chou was there, but we were feelin the sentiment. i very much wish i could have seen the new york show... newly (sorta) reunited smashers were there plus of course AFI. they who make my world go 'round. (photo above, used without permission. lo siento.) bloc party and keane and the chili peppers were in london, that would have been super duper, as well. too bad.
speaking of music, has anyone been listening to cool stuff lately? recent obsessions include sunny day real estate and old UB40, plus aventura that i mentioned a while back. but i need some new stuff. am anxiously waiting the black audio debut album dropping aug 14. my sister WILL be bringing me an album, hot off the presses, when she comes to see me. and prolly some gear, too. i'm hoping they're going to have a local show when i'm home in december, but prolly unlikely as it'll be damn close to xmas around then. shucks.
kayi was excited to find out that mark farina's going to be in shanghai, but i'm over it. my friend cyndi used to drag me to his shows - usually at snowdrift - and that fool like rarely actually showed up. that's poor form.
grown & sexy
okay, i'm borrowing the title of this post from dan's new party (starting at de la coast this coming friday, july 13... holla...), which i think is the coolest name ever, but my point is really this: i am 29 years old, gainfully employed (again), and - to quote chris rock - a grown-ass woman. i find it nice to once in a while hang out with the jiao da kids - either my own indonesian / guatemalan sector, or sherry's german / british / french group for some post-college energy rejuvenation, but i really do not need to engage in RMB 99 all-you-can-eat-and-drink fests that consist of questionable food and even more questionable drink.
because then you find yourself on the bathroom floor, using the bathmat as a pillow, hearing vague snatches of conversation between cyn and jason about the positive and negative design aspects of your watch, which sits on the dining table. you're completely soaked through from hanging your head out of the taxi while driving over the nanpu bridge during a torrential rainstorm. i'm sorry, but i am too motherfucking old to still be doing this shit.
let's back up. one of the things that i think cyn wanted to help me do when i moved here was to decompress. between us, that speaks volumes, because i think that we both feel that i skipped over the fun part of my youth and went straight to an adult phase, hyperfixated on the progress of my career, my finances, and carrying a mortgage at 26. we all partied in college, sure, but we were also very cautious about who we spoke to, who bought us drinks, what kind of clubs to go to. there wasn't a random freedom - it was more like a carefully planned assault on the bay area nightlife. life these days here in stinky 'old SH is much looser, much more random, and i don't disagree that it's probably just what i needed before i turned 45 on my 28th birthday, if you understand where i'm comin from.
so, decompress i have. i'm pretty inflated these days. but i've decided that i need to establish some guidelines for myself. the first rule is something like, avoid all-you-can-drink alcohol buffets. the liquor is bullshit and makes you sick and doesn't help with the tendency one might have of not realizing she needs to slow it down. one likes to pretend one has the liver of a 300-pound trucker, but one likes to fool oneself. rule two will run along the lines of, if the sake you've been knocking back tastes like nail polish remover or paint thinner, don't drink it. duh. and rule three is, if your friend, let's call her sherry, is screaming about how she wants to get everyone drunk and make them barf, temper this a little bit. it's ok to say no. duh again.
jesus.
i'm not blaming this on anyone except for me. sorry if i sound like i am. i just don't understand why i don't have the capacity, once the drinks start flowing, to realize that i'm about 4 sakes bottles deep and i need to chill a bit, not bounce blithely to the next venue. i'm a grown woman. i need to know these things.
because then you find yourself on the bathroom floor, using the bathmat as a pillow, hearing vague snatches of conversation between cyn and jason about the positive and negative design aspects of your watch, which sits on the dining table. you're completely soaked through from hanging your head out of the taxi while driving over the nanpu bridge during a torrential rainstorm. i'm sorry, but i am too motherfucking old to still be doing this shit.
let's back up. one of the things that i think cyn wanted to help me do when i moved here was to decompress. between us, that speaks volumes, because i think that we both feel that i skipped over the fun part of my youth and went straight to an adult phase, hyperfixated on the progress of my career, my finances, and carrying a mortgage at 26. we all partied in college, sure, but we were also very cautious about who we spoke to, who bought us drinks, what kind of clubs to go to. there wasn't a random freedom - it was more like a carefully planned assault on the bay area nightlife. life these days here in stinky 'old SH is much looser, much more random, and i don't disagree that it's probably just what i needed before i turned 45 on my 28th birthday, if you understand where i'm comin from.
so, decompress i have. i'm pretty inflated these days. but i've decided that i need to establish some guidelines for myself. the first rule is something like, avoid all-you-can-drink alcohol buffets. the liquor is bullshit and makes you sick and doesn't help with the tendency one might have of not realizing she needs to slow it down. one likes to pretend one has the liver of a 300-pound trucker, but one likes to fool oneself. rule two will run along the lines of, if the sake you've been knocking back tastes like nail polish remover or paint thinner, don't drink it. duh. and rule three is, if your friend, let's call her sherry, is screaming about how she wants to get everyone drunk and make them barf, temper this a little bit. it's ok to say no. duh again.
jesus.
i'm not blaming this on anyone except for me. sorry if i sound like i am. i just don't understand why i don't have the capacity, once the drinks start flowing, to realize that i'm about 4 sakes bottles deep and i need to chill a bit, not bounce blithely to the next venue. i'm a grown woman. i need to know these things.
Friday, July 06, 2007
i'm covered in frosting
...and it's caked in my left ear and smeared around my neck. don't ask.
weekends open up such a plethora of options! i need to buy shoes.
weekends open up such a plethora of options! i need to buy shoes.
Thursday, July 05, 2007
con permiso
per request:
http://www.smartshanghai.com/blog/731/Dance_Studios_in_Shanghai_shanghai#more
i will collapse tomorrow. i will. i hope. alvin's heading to muse tomorrow night and i vow to be far far away from him when he calls.
get to go to the design studio tomorrow and see our new product line, yay! will also meet the design team and see our other location, which is rumored to be really nice, with a garden. i have to say, as much as i used to butt heads with our creative team in the past, i really do prefer to work in a more creative-firm environment. things are more fluid - the sense of time, the fashion. people appreciate the efforts you put into your earrings. there's one guy at work that compliments me daily about some aspect of my outfit - today it was my shoes - but it's in this really odd, formal (singaporean?) manner that just functions to make me uncomfortable and i'm convinced is to throw me off so he can steal my pens. i used to work in an office filled with gay men who had pink dress shirt day and would notice every aspect of your outfit, or if you got more layers cut into your hair. i guess i have to adjust to not being around that, but it'll be the first time in 7 years, really.
just got home. so tired, but with a hyper undercurrent that i'm trying to quell. i know as soon as i sit for a bit i'll be fine and will be able to sleep. slamming myself into a work schedule has basically meant that i'm fighting back with espressos. we have this fully automated, ultra nice espresso machine in the kitchen that makes me lovely little beverages in about 45 seconds with just the push of a button. the wonders of modern inventions. and how oh so bad they are for me.
my mind is going into a warp because i'm so used to my vaio and its interface and functionality, and just the layout of the keyboard. i'm being corrupted by the stupid work thinkpad and so i find myself bending space, time, and spoons trying to figure out where the holy hell the correct keys are for each. my brain does not toggle via alt + tab.
we were talking tonight about how much we miss costco. my dad goes for the sole purpose of grazing on food samples. i like to hit up the electronics, the books, the dvds, and the pre-made party dip aisle. also, the clothes are always a fun adventure because you never know what kind of high-rise, super tapered mid-tone denim you'll find there. or oversized ralph lauren towels that the cat decides is her bed. so entertaining, costco. i think all of my mom's clothes and shoes that don't come from talbot are costco purchases. and you wonder why she has 3 forest green button-down fleeces to spare? and more sneakers than you can shake a stick at? and about 40,000 q-tips?
ugh, i have so many blisters and open wounds on my feet. i need a new set.
Tuesday, July 03, 2007
champagne cocktails
falling asleep on the toilet? i've never done that. i did fall asleep in the bathtub a couple of times, but not for more than a few minutes at a time. not like my friend chad who passed out drunk in his parents' bathtub all night (filled with water), resulting in scaring the hell out of his dad the next morning who thought his firstborn had drowned.
today is proof that i can work, go to yoga, and still go out at night. tomorrow will be proof that i cannot.
jen's in town, so we had drinks (and dinner, sort of) with her and jason. jason is getting lots of love from our female friends these days thinking he's cute. since some of us have known him for anywhere from one to three years, this simply indicates to me that sometimes your number is just UP. i saw again the same thai trannies from the other night, sitting outside of starbucks again. again! this time they didn't appear to be fishing, but i got so excited that i jumped up and down and pointed them out to jason rather loudly. oops. they didn't seem offended, and he wasn't fazed.
stephanie mentioned that she would bet that work at DR would be slow enough that i would be updating my blog at work. i am not getting that same indication. my first week - arguably the slowest week of one's tenure - has been pretty damn fast. lots of meetings and already i am sensing shall we say, challenge from certain colleagues (whom i found out this morning will be reporting to me in a couple of months... do not think they will be happy about that given the attitude i sensed today at our touch base). said colleague followed up his laundry list of personal beef with openly admiring my watch (which is think is kinda gay for a straight dude) and asking where i go clubbing. wha? things sho' do run differently in china.
i need to buy some work clothes.
have already decided that i will be pushing the envelope on lunchtime stringency. one cannot go to a venue and order and consume a lunch in 30 minutes, especially in the restaurant wasteland where i work. i am going to be a foreigner and act like one on this subject. gregor is just up the street, and jason works up the street, and i demand the flexibility to meet lunch buddies when the need arises.
well, i'll think about it anyway.
night night. kiss kiss from your favorite, semi-tipsy blogger.
Monday, July 02, 2007
and... we're back to work
whew. ok. now i remember why i used to come home and faceplant on the sofa. i also remember the air conditioning phenomenon - 95 degrees outside with 82% humidity and i'm pacing around the office, wishing i had a sweatshirt. i'm packing a pashmina tomorrow, as ridiculous as that sounds.back home, i used to have a pretty decent commute - my house was 10 minutes from the train, and my office was about 15 minutes on the other end. my team was pretty much all late birds like me - roll in an hour later than everyone else (well, ok, i was always the latest except for kat over on the other side), and i'd usually be able to sniff out someone else burning the midnight oil to walk to the train with at night. you never know what kind of walls you can break down in those 15 minutes at the end of the day. i always thought walking to the train was a pain in the ass, but in retrospect i think that little bit of space between office and home was a good thing. sometimes a lot of space, like 3 hours and 9 glasses of wine and the bleary realization that your new boss is hitting on you, but most times just some walking time helps. i think i connected with people more during those walks than any other time during those five years.
today i stepped out of the office into the warm, humid air and realized i was doing it all over again. things are different, of course; i'm a bit steadier and i have significantly fewer obligations, i'm walking by myself, not flanked by colleagues, not to mention the whole different country thing - a man helping his toddler son urinate in a planter as i walked by was reminder enough - but things are essentially falling back into the same rhythm.
i remember my first day at w-s; the guy i was dating at the time was unable to contain his excitement about the fact that i - his significantly younger girlfriend - was buckling down and finally entering a more tame period in her life. i was becoming a more viable candidate, i suppose. he sent a pretty fucking amazing bouquet from rayon vert and the card read, 'and the next chapter begins.' that sentence embodied so much at the time - apropos but rife with his condescending approval for an oh-so-young carolyn stepping out in her platform shoes. and, oddly enough, i still haven't forgotten it, despite the many many things that have happened since then. i went from loving rayon vert to adoring rose & radish, then on to pinon design. funny how many florists you can love in a lifetime.
Sunday, July 01, 2007
i'm so tired
and emotionally drained. i thought i left this heaviness behind.
at this age, we all know who we are (my folks do, anyway) and what works for us. i think i keep a tight rein on optimism, allowing just enough to let the days be happy, but always with a wary eye on breaks in the pattern. you just never know.
and some days you go into a situation knowing you're going to be pulling walls down, and hoping inside that people have the strength and the clarity to show you you're wrong. every single time, you leave with this dubious honor, this questionable victory. and all you can think about when you walk along the streets is that for once, it would be so very nice to be absolutely wrong, to have all of your doubts thrown out and stomped on and set on fire.
i have work tomorrow. it's the first time i've said that in nearly a year. 25 days short. and tomorrow i will go in, and shake hands, and smile, and talk about business stuff. and on this plank i will proceed.
at this age, we all know who we are (my folks do, anyway) and what works for us. i think i keep a tight rein on optimism, allowing just enough to let the days be happy, but always with a wary eye on breaks in the pattern. you just never know.
and some days you go into a situation knowing you're going to be pulling walls down, and hoping inside that people have the strength and the clarity to show you you're wrong. every single time, you leave with this dubious honor, this questionable victory. and all you can think about when you walk along the streets is that for once, it would be so very nice to be absolutely wrong, to have all of your doubts thrown out and stomped on and set on fire.
i have work tomorrow. it's the first time i've said that in nearly a year. 25 days short. and tomorrow i will go in, and shake hands, and smile, and talk about business stuff. and on this plank i will proceed.
Saturday, June 30, 2007
que frustrado...
sometimes finding a time to calls moms and then actually reaching her is like banging your head against a concrete wall. argh.
on the good tip, our air con was successfully installed and i only blew out one power strip and melted one plug converter to do it. we had a hell of a time finding the stupid 16A plugs and had to go to 4 stores (well, cyn went to all 4, i only went to 2) to find them. we now have what is probably the most ghetto air con hookup on the planet, but it works and there have been no more electrical fires. (oops.)
it's amazing how much cool, dehumidified air can make everyone just a little more sane. a little happier. a little calmer. we're nicer to each other. we find time to do the little things in life, like scrub our mildewed shoes. (can you believe this shit? i found like 3 pairs of my shoes, in my room, cultivating mold or something. it was disgusting, i almost vomited. that shows you how fucking steamy it's been here without the air. god. that's so gross i'm still getting the heebie jeebies. i mean, these are not wet shoes or overly sweaty shoes, either. one pair i wear all the time, another pair i haven't worn since february, and neither pair has been wet. wtf? so so so nasty. nasty nasty nasty. gross. barf. sick. disgusting. ew. gross.)
ahem. sorry.
last night was sherry's full moon party. sometimes i'm in the mood for crazy, hyper-energetic parties where the attendees show up in pink wigs and mermaid dresses and there is belly and pole dancing to be watched. but other nights i'm tired, my tummy is doing its unhappy thing, and my roommate is ditching me to go somewhere else. i'm not excited about seeing bewigged people skidding around the place, and the cigarette smoke makes me want to extinguish the lighted sticks on people's faces. not a good time for me to be out and about. then i feel conflicted: do i stay by myself and not even try to make conversation with people milling about, and sit waiting for sherry to have a minute while i don't make a single attempt to not look bored, or do i just go home? normally, i sit and wait all night for my friend. but last night i had to channel some self-involvement and i took myself home. in bed with the air on.
on the good tip, our air con was successfully installed and i only blew out one power strip and melted one plug converter to do it. we had a hell of a time finding the stupid 16A plugs and had to go to 4 stores (well, cyn went to all 4, i only went to 2) to find them. we now have what is probably the most ghetto air con hookup on the planet, but it works and there have been no more electrical fires. (oops.)
it's amazing how much cool, dehumidified air can make everyone just a little more sane. a little happier. a little calmer. we're nicer to each other. we find time to do the little things in life, like scrub our mildewed shoes. (can you believe this shit? i found like 3 pairs of my shoes, in my room, cultivating mold or something. it was disgusting, i almost vomited. that shows you how fucking steamy it's been here without the air. god. that's so gross i'm still getting the heebie jeebies. i mean, these are not wet shoes or overly sweaty shoes, either. one pair i wear all the time, another pair i haven't worn since february, and neither pair has been wet. wtf? so so so nasty. nasty nasty nasty. gross. barf. sick. disgusting. ew. gross.)
ahem. sorry.
last night was sherry's full moon party. sometimes i'm in the mood for crazy, hyper-energetic parties where the attendees show up in pink wigs and mermaid dresses and there is belly and pole dancing to be watched. but other nights i'm tired, my tummy is doing its unhappy thing, and my roommate is ditching me to go somewhere else. i'm not excited about seeing bewigged people skidding around the place, and the cigarette smoke makes me want to extinguish the lighted sticks on people's faces. not a good time for me to be out and about. then i feel conflicted: do i stay by myself and not even try to make conversation with people milling about, and sit waiting for sherry to have a minute while i don't make a single attempt to not look bored, or do i just go home? normally, i sit and wait all night for my friend. but last night i had to channel some self-involvement and i took myself home. in bed with the air on.
Thursday, June 28, 2007
monsoon
omg, finally finished that pile of paper i was handed last week. i'd estimated two days, but then i'd forgotten how short my attention span is recently. i'm like a fruit fly. drosophila. glad that's over. repetitive corrections are not fun.... zzzzz....
so. tonight. sherry and bad cats team have 'capture the flag' tonight in fuxing park. (meeting by the marx and engels statue... i find it funny that there's actually a statue for those two, but i guess that's just due to my regionalism and macarthyist histories of said region). i don't think i'll be capturing anything, but i will attend for posterity. and support. it's pouring fuggin rain outside, tho. so the relative instability of the weather may preclude any actual decision-making on my part regarding whether or not to try and trip someone up for flag-snatching purposes.
if i'm not making any sense, it's because i've been editing website copy for three days. i'm lost in a cloud that is my head. and, because the air con is still broken at my house (new units being installed as i type), i'm not sleeping much. topping out at 5 hours a night. i woke up at 8:30 this morning and my thermostat read 89 degrees. in my room. not acceptable. i'd taken to scrunching up on the bottom left corner of my bed so i could at least feel a slight draft from my fan, as i was too asleep to try and understand how to properly point the stupid thing so it would actually provide some windage. windiness. wind. i've been staying out all day and as close to all night as i can manage because i've been avoiding the steambath that is our apartment. just being on the bus was more enjoyable.
yesterday went to some party that was supposed to be a 'private' (haha) company party for a big advertising company. private it was not, but party it was. they flew in the entire tokyo office for a week of partying, and also brought along hifana, this somewhat indescribable team of tokyo-based musicians-slash-djs. great show. we missed the bananas set afterwards because sherry, steph, and i hid upstairs in the air conditioning, but i saw dan again today so i guess my fly-by presence at his lunch with adele made up for it or something. not really, but you know.
the longer i spend in china, the more i appreciate japanese boy style. there were of course a ton of tokyo boys (not too many girls, i'm not just noticing boys because i'm depraved) last night and it's just nice to be around people who have good style and good rhythm and shit like that. you know, like dreadlocks and crazy outfits and good jeans and correct accessorizing. puts me at ease. there was also a mini version of bai ling dancing around, which was disconcerting.
deciding that i am almost certainly going back to niseko for some snowboarding come CNY. i'm a bit concerned that i'm going to suck because i never get to go here, but i guess i'll have to just suck then. falling on your face on a 20-meter base isn't going to hurt much. so then i need to go home to the bay to get my stuff, which i was planning to do for xmas. my sister's email to me today quashed that short-lived euphoria:
"I was going to suggest that you come home for Thanksgiving instead because as you know we are not celebrating Christmas, plus, most people have more time off for it than Christmas. I mentioned that to Dad and he said yup, unless someone has a baby really fast. Stupid. So I plan on not being there for Christmas at all. My protest against their ridiculous statement. The money I save on Christmas presents will go toward my ticket elsewhere. I don't care where else. Prob. D.C."
my parents are refusing to celebrate xmas until they someone (i.e. me or my sister) gets knocked up. we both find this absurd, and if i weren't so overly confident in my maternal-convincing skills, rather distressing. i will play the overseas daughter guilt card. i will. i must have christmas. it's what makes the world go 'round. thanksgiving is out of the question because it's too soon and i think we have some big brand launch in the fall, plus i kinda just want to go head-to-head with the stubborn rhino that is my mother. i will show her the error of her ways. i just refilled my skype account so she better look out!
since our house is the hub of holiday activities, my mom is denying her entire clan the pleasure that is our xmas (and xmas eve) dinner. it's absolutely my favorite time of year and i will be so so sad if my mommy goes through with her retarded blackmail strategy. it won't function to speed up the grandchildren any, but it sure will function to alienate her family. but, being my mom, this won't dawn on her, and if it does, won't faze her. i think a childhood of fending for her siblings has hardened my mom to everything, especially what makes her family happy.
**note: ck, these are specific instructions to read that last paragraph aloud to mom**
battle.
so. tonight. sherry and bad cats team have 'capture the flag' tonight in fuxing park. (meeting by the marx and engels statue... i find it funny that there's actually a statue for those two, but i guess that's just due to my regionalism and macarthyist histories of said region). i don't think i'll be capturing anything, but i will attend for posterity. and support. it's pouring fuggin rain outside, tho. so the relative instability of the weather may preclude any actual decision-making on my part regarding whether or not to try and trip someone up for flag-snatching purposes.
if i'm not making any sense, it's because i've been editing website copy for three days. i'm lost in a cloud that is my head. and, because the air con is still broken at my house (new units being installed as i type), i'm not sleeping much. topping out at 5 hours a night. i woke up at 8:30 this morning and my thermostat read 89 degrees. in my room. not acceptable. i'd taken to scrunching up on the bottom left corner of my bed so i could at least feel a slight draft from my fan, as i was too asleep to try and understand how to properly point the stupid thing so it would actually provide some windage. windiness. wind. i've been staying out all day and as close to all night as i can manage because i've been avoiding the steambath that is our apartment. just being on the bus was more enjoyable.
yesterday went to some party that was supposed to be a 'private' (haha) company party for a big advertising company. private it was not, but party it was. they flew in the entire tokyo office for a week of partying, and also brought along hifana, this somewhat indescribable team of tokyo-based musicians-slash-djs. great show. we missed the bananas set afterwards because sherry, steph, and i hid upstairs in the air conditioning, but i saw dan again today so i guess my fly-by presence at his lunch with adele made up for it or something. not really, but you know.
the longer i spend in china, the more i appreciate japanese boy style. there were of course a ton of tokyo boys (not too many girls, i'm not just noticing boys because i'm depraved) last night and it's just nice to be around people who have good style and good rhythm and shit like that. you know, like dreadlocks and crazy outfits and good jeans and correct accessorizing. puts me at ease. there was also a mini version of bai ling dancing around, which was disconcerting.
deciding that i am almost certainly going back to niseko for some snowboarding come CNY. i'm a bit concerned that i'm going to suck because i never get to go here, but i guess i'll have to just suck then. falling on your face on a 20-meter base isn't going to hurt much. so then i need to go home to the bay to get my stuff, which i was planning to do for xmas. my sister's email to me today quashed that short-lived euphoria:
"I was going to suggest that you come home for Thanksgiving instead because as you know we are not celebrating Christmas, plus, most people have more time off for it than Christmas. I mentioned that to Dad and he said yup, unless someone has a baby really fast. Stupid. So I plan on not being there for Christmas at all. My protest against their ridiculous statement. The money I save on Christmas presents will go toward my ticket elsewhere. I don't care where else. Prob. D.C."
my parents are refusing to celebrate xmas until they someone (i.e. me or my sister) gets knocked up. we both find this absurd, and if i weren't so overly confident in my maternal-convincing skills, rather distressing. i will play the overseas daughter guilt card. i will. i must have christmas. it's what makes the world go 'round. thanksgiving is out of the question because it's too soon and i think we have some big brand launch in the fall, plus i kinda just want to go head-to-head with the stubborn rhino that is my mother. i will show her the error of her ways. i just refilled my skype account so she better look out!
since our house is the hub of holiday activities, my mom is denying her entire clan the pleasure that is our xmas (and xmas eve) dinner. it's absolutely my favorite time of year and i will be so so sad if my mommy goes through with her retarded blackmail strategy. it won't function to speed up the grandchildren any, but it sure will function to alienate her family. but, being my mom, this won't dawn on her, and if it does, won't faze her. i think a childhood of fending for her siblings has hardened my mom to everything, especially what makes her family happy.
**note: ck, these are specific instructions to read that last paragraph aloud to mom**
battle.
Sunday, June 24, 2007
la vie en rose (la mome)
probably daily, definitely weekly, i thank the stars or fates or whatever that i have friends who influence me to see new things or do something i wouldn't ordinarily do. tonight sherry wanted to see one of the shanghai film festival flicks, which always sounds good in theory, but inevitably i get too lazy to actually execute on. tonight we had a little pseudo-date, went and hunted down the burrito place (rather inexplicably named new york deli) and then went to see la vie en rose (la mome), a movie about the life of edith piaf. yawn, right? who cares about a dead french chanteuse from the 40s and 50s?
no. see it. it's so good. really incredible. the acting, the writing, the direction, the cinematography. i haven't seen a movie that impressive in a long time. who knew she led such a captivating life? and to think i would have missed it if sherry hadn't wanted to go and see a movie.
footnote: my first movie theater experience in china. surprisingly civilized. no smoking allowed in the theater, i only heard one cell phone go off, and we went to the lawsons on the floor below and had them pop some popcorn for us, so you can pretty much bring in whatever snacks you want. we were expecting a lot of cellophane crumpling, loud convos in shanghainese, people lighting up. none of that, just us westerners guffawing at the funny parts.
later we walked to xintiandi, where apparently it was thai tranny night. we saw multiple groups of 'girls' fishing for dates, flirting with tourists. did we miss the memo? is there a tranny convention in town, or is this normal for a sunday night? we need to know. a lot of them had boob jobs (and generous ones at that), indicating A) they have some money and B) they're invested in their futures as women. finding good transvestites in shanghai is really tough - being from the bay i've seen the best of the best - and these girls were the sure thing. must be from out of town; the makeup and the hair and the clothes were too skillful to be from around here.
no. see it. it's so good. really incredible. the acting, the writing, the direction, the cinematography. i haven't seen a movie that impressive in a long time. who knew she led such a captivating life? and to think i would have missed it if sherry hadn't wanted to go and see a movie.
footnote: my first movie theater experience in china. surprisingly civilized. no smoking allowed in the theater, i only heard one cell phone go off, and we went to the lawsons on the floor below and had them pop some popcorn for us, so you can pretty much bring in whatever snacks you want. we were expecting a lot of cellophane crumpling, loud convos in shanghainese, people lighting up. none of that, just us westerners guffawing at the funny parts.
later we walked to xintiandi, where apparently it was thai tranny night. we saw multiple groups of 'girls' fishing for dates, flirting with tourists. did we miss the memo? is there a tranny convention in town, or is this normal for a sunday night? we need to know. a lot of them had boob jobs (and generous ones at that), indicating A) they have some money and B) they're invested in their futures as women. finding good transvestites in shanghai is really tough - being from the bay i've seen the best of the best - and these girls were the sure thing. must be from out of town; the makeup and the hair and the clothes were too skillful to be from around here.
fyi
i need to hear comments. write something to me, please. this is an unrequited activity, blogging. so i need to hear from one or all of you super-busy people that i love very dearly but never hear a fucking word from. throw a girl a bone, why don't you.
peeping at purple
once again. sipping coffee, reading the times. this is what makes my world function, despite the heat and the fact that my ears are sweating. small amounts of time spent with a certain degree of focus and quiet fuels the mental and emotional energy for a day. any day. every day.
how else do you hear about things like this?:
http://www.nytimes.com/2007/06/24/fashion/24renegade.html
one wonders how i made it through 7 years of corporate life that began anywhere from 7:30 to 9 am. my boss and mentor understood that i couldn't and didn't function before approximately 10:30, so she usually avoided me until then, leaving me to quiet, hermit work like retail analysis or markdown acceleration. but she didn't come around until 2002, a full three years after graduation. i wonder how i survived. i wonder how my work didn't suffer. i wonder about people who bounce out of bed at the crack of dawn, ready to start the day, running in meadows and singing coca cola ditties while holding the hands of those similarly inclined as the sun rises. engaging in conversation with someone other than very close friends or family before i'm truly awake is a no-no. it commonly results with me either blurting out something awkward (one of my greatest talents) or somehow compromising myself by over-compensating for my lack of enthusiasm by committing to delivering this project in two hours despite back-to-back meetings all morning, or driving someone to the airport at 5 am. i am at my weakest in the morning. but don't try to pull any fast ones, you. because i do wake up eventually and i can either waste 30 minutes of your time engaging in the most uncomfortable, circuitous explanation of why i can't do what i promised earlier - and who on earth wants to hear that shit - or i'll just avoid you and pretend the conversation never took place.
so. the heat is here. we arrived back from the lovely mountain clime of niseko and deplaned into a ruthless wall of heat and moisture. the next 4+ months will be spent in varying degrees of sweatiness; from a fine veil we like to refer to as 'dewy' (lasts about 5 minutes after bathing) to a dripping sort of personal precipitation that encompasses your entire mental capacity and silly things like rivulets running down your back gain precedence over conversation (halting them) or hailing taxis (forgetting to). the latter is usually accompanied by a garfield-like thought-bubble floating over one's head, filled with expletives.
we in si hao lou, yao ling yao have yet to turn on the air. this is because we are actually too lazy to do it, in a roundabout way. our central air is so inefficient you barely notice it's on when indeed it is. so we have been meaning to run down to the management office and negotiate one of those standing ones (eyesores, yes, but critical to one's sanity in august) for the living room, plus get the lazy cheap bastards to install screens over the windows (mosquitos have taken to turning our legs into the bellagio buffet). but, crippled by our laziness, we sweat and curse the day.
Saturday, June 23, 2007
and the sky was falling
so hot in the studio today. i had this drill sargeant of a yogi who had the biggest j-lo ass i've ever seen on an east asian girl. i could've served drinks on that thing. she was mean, but for some reason took a liking to me and so focused her rather questionable attentions on me during the entire duration of the class. this entailed rapping me on the quadriceps and yelling at me to lock my knee, telling me to take off my shirt because i had my beater tucked up in my sports bra (it was hot like you would not believe), pushing me over in standing boat-pulling pose, threatening to take away my towel if i didn't stop fanning myself, and lecturing me about my water consumption. my mom is kinda like that so i don't take it personally. after class she gave me another earful about bothering to wear a shirt to class (don't) and then i saw her again later and she told me that i needed to drink a lot of water. was that commentary on my profuse sweating during the class?
after hot went down to fuxing lu to meet up with steph and albert. they'd been drinking since brunch and were well into their seventh or so round when i got there. whilst perusing the menu, the sky suddenly (and literally) opened up and a huge rainstorm came crashing down. it's still storming and thundering nearly 12 hours later. albert had designs on tapas, but after raindrops the size of quarters came barreling down, we overruled him and decided to just stay and order pub food. people kept staggering into the pub completely saturated and streaming water, and that was enough. sherry joined a bit later fresh from a nap, and joined in the gluttony.
halfway through our meal, a small blonde toddler came over to me, put her hand in mine, and then proceeded to cuddle. it was the oddest thing. her dad came running over apologetically and explained that i was wearing similar clothes to her mom (i wasn't). plus the baby looked right into my face before she walked over. that, of course, spawned multiple cracks about daddy's other 'mommy' that he brings home when real mommy isn't home, and then ayi jokes.
seeing a small blonde head on my lap - so jolting. obviously my kids will never be similarly pigmented, but to have a child sort of fearlessly and familiarly clamber onto me was really a strange feeling, once i got past the surprise. can't explain because i don't want to explore it right now, and probably won't figure anything out if i do anyway.
we eventually made our way to constellation on xinle lu. such a cool place. i'd heard about it a few times and it really is a cool, relaxing spot. at one point i was uncouth enough to just lay out on one of the sofas - poor albert came back from the bathroom and had to pull up a chair from the bar. i can see my mom shuddering at the fact that i was all cleopatra in a bar, but i guess she should know me well enough by now. all of the bartenders are japanese and the drinks are properly done and not expensive. i'm very pro-japan right now. good ventilation, very chill vibe, clean bathroom. check, check, check.
not much going on tomorrow. enjoying my last days of freedom. there are brunch plans and dim sum plans, but i'm not committing to anything. i like my days to be flexible.
after hot went down to fuxing lu to meet up with steph and albert. they'd been drinking since brunch and were well into their seventh or so round when i got there. whilst perusing the menu, the sky suddenly (and literally) opened up and a huge rainstorm came crashing down. it's still storming and thundering nearly 12 hours later. albert had designs on tapas, but after raindrops the size of quarters came barreling down, we overruled him and decided to just stay and order pub food. people kept staggering into the pub completely saturated and streaming water, and that was enough. sherry joined a bit later fresh from a nap, and joined in the gluttony.
halfway through our meal, a small blonde toddler came over to me, put her hand in mine, and then proceeded to cuddle. it was the oddest thing. her dad came running over apologetically and explained that i was wearing similar clothes to her mom (i wasn't). plus the baby looked right into my face before she walked over. that, of course, spawned multiple cracks about daddy's other 'mommy' that he brings home when real mommy isn't home, and then ayi jokes.
seeing a small blonde head on my lap - so jolting. obviously my kids will never be similarly pigmented, but to have a child sort of fearlessly and familiarly clamber onto me was really a strange feeling, once i got past the surprise. can't explain because i don't want to explore it right now, and probably won't figure anything out if i do anyway.
we eventually made our way to constellation on xinle lu. such a cool place. i'd heard about it a few times and it really is a cool, relaxing spot. at one point i was uncouth enough to just lay out on one of the sofas - poor albert came back from the bathroom and had to pull up a chair from the bar. i can see my mom shuddering at the fact that i was all cleopatra in a bar, but i guess she should know me well enough by now. all of the bartenders are japanese and the drinks are properly done and not expensive. i'm very pro-japan right now. good ventilation, very chill vibe, clean bathroom. check, check, check.
not much going on tomorrow. enjoying my last days of freedom. there are brunch plans and dim sum plans, but i'm not committing to anything. i like my days to be flexible.
Friday, June 22, 2007
air kisses suck
...i prefer real. this means that i usually end up smacking you one on the cheek when you were expecting a dry brush-by, but oh well.
went to a dinner party tonight and expected to be home before midnight, but you know how these things go. the host was a very tall czech friend of sherry's. i love being in european households. they always have the good food and tons of wine and bubbly, and andrea was no exception. she was exceptional in that her music selection was good. tall she is, this andrea. in fact, there were three andreas present tonight, and the tallest one was perhaps the tallest chinese person i've ever seen. alix introduced him to me while i had my back to them (stirring the risotto) and i turned around and just saw chest. he's from italy, and he must've thrived off the pasta or something.
not feeling drinky these days. had less than 4 bevies the whole trip in japan and just 2 glasses of bubbly tonight. i think the bikini night did me in. thinking about vodka continues to instill the dry-heave feeling. that's ok. some people are less happy about my partying ways than others (hi mom) so this little reprieve is welcome.
we had horse sashimi in japan. and emu sashimi. i prefer the emu. duc observed that the horse tasted exactly like you would imagine a horse to taste. a bit gamey.
i bought japanese toothpaste at the sapporo airport because of the whole melamine thing goin on with toothpaste manufactured in china, but little did i know that the baby rabbit holding a toothbrush on the tube wasn't your standard japanese cuteness, but actually indicated children's toothpaste. yuck. if there was a flavor that should not exist as part of a dental artifice, it's passionfruit.
heard from a former boy toy tonight. it's funny how people pop in and out of your life, like your feelings - not even feelings, inclinations - towards them remain constant despite the time lapse since the last time you spoke. his offer was not difficult to decline, but it makes me shake my head sometimes. i honestly wonder what people think of themselves, and of me. lots of things happen in very short time frames. it's no wonder that some people lose track of what it is they actually want, they don't even realize what they're doing day to day. get a grip.
i think my cold combined with the asthma almost killed me in japan, but i'm on the mend. don't go to hokkaido in the summer without arming yourself with beaucoup zyrtec and several inhalers. the clean air was a bonus, but i hadn't counted on the extreme pollen count, which is apparently as dangerous or more so than allergen cousins, pollution and smog.
doing the head nod while typing. sleep.
went to a dinner party tonight and expected to be home before midnight, but you know how these things go. the host was a very tall czech friend of sherry's. i love being in european households. they always have the good food and tons of wine and bubbly, and andrea was no exception. she was exceptional in that her music selection was good. tall she is, this andrea. in fact, there were three andreas present tonight, and the tallest one was perhaps the tallest chinese person i've ever seen. alix introduced him to me while i had my back to them (stirring the risotto) and i turned around and just saw chest. he's from italy, and he must've thrived off the pasta or something.
not feeling drinky these days. had less than 4 bevies the whole trip in japan and just 2 glasses of bubbly tonight. i think the bikini night did me in. thinking about vodka continues to instill the dry-heave feeling. that's ok. some people are less happy about my partying ways than others (hi mom) so this little reprieve is welcome.
we had horse sashimi in japan. and emu sashimi. i prefer the emu. duc observed that the horse tasted exactly like you would imagine a horse to taste. a bit gamey.
i bought japanese toothpaste at the sapporo airport because of the whole melamine thing goin on with toothpaste manufactured in china, but little did i know that the baby rabbit holding a toothbrush on the tube wasn't your standard japanese cuteness, but actually indicated children's toothpaste. yuck. if there was a flavor that should not exist as part of a dental artifice, it's passionfruit.
heard from a former boy toy tonight. it's funny how people pop in and out of your life, like your feelings - not even feelings, inclinations - towards them remain constant despite the time lapse since the last time you spoke. his offer was not difficult to decline, but it makes me shake my head sometimes. i honestly wonder what people think of themselves, and of me. lots of things happen in very short time frames. it's no wonder that some people lose track of what it is they actually want, they don't even realize what they're doing day to day. get a grip.
i think my cold combined with the asthma almost killed me in japan, but i'm on the mend. don't go to hokkaido in the summer without arming yourself with beaucoup zyrtec and several inhalers. the clean air was a bonus, but i hadn't counted on the extreme pollen count, which is apparently as dangerous or more so than allergen cousins, pollution and smog.
doing the head nod while typing. sleep.
Thursday, June 21, 2007
a little clean air, a little uni
'mother mountain' - mt. yotei
our lovely place - more chalet than cabin, i guess
reliving our day camp days with a little archery...
some fly fishing...
some swingin'
and a whole lot of eating
and eating
and more eating!
waders are hot, by the way
and, just because it's japan, some weirdness:
a sign for one of the many pensions in hirafu village
the train guy - this tiny little guy on the train back to sapporo with the biggest badass shoes
Thursday, June 14, 2007
one for the books
i love mornings when you wake up wearing your bikini, in bed not knowing how you got there, with a bottle cap, various kleenex, and a small drawstring bag you bought in japan scattered across the sheet. i vaguely remember sleeping on the bathroom floor for a while, but apparently i picked myself up, took my contacts out, and dragged myself to bed.
whoa.
i don't actually love these mornings. but sometimes, for the good of the psyche, they're necessary for blowing off some steam. some nights your friends see the look in your eye and they know that they're in for a big night, whether or not they want it, and whether or not you actually leave the house. and that's what friends do. that's who they are. they get pissed at the people that hurt you, they say fuck 'em when you're trying to be fair about it, whatever. they rally. and i'm so grateful.
whoa.
i don't actually love these mornings. but sometimes, for the good of the psyche, they're necessary for blowing off some steam. some nights your friends see the look in your eye and they know that they're in for a big night, whether or not they want it, and whether or not you actually leave the house. and that's what friends do. that's who they are. they get pissed at the people that hurt you, they say fuck 'em when you're trying to be fair about it, whatever. they rally. and i'm so grateful.
Wednesday, June 13, 2007
yeah, that's right
so, things are happening. stars or planets or whatever are in alignment. people are doing things and going places and... yeah. mostly people are leaving for holiday and weddings in their home countries and good stuff like that. alvin is going back to indo next week and his mom will greet him at the airport with satay in hand. lisa and her friend ana are going backpacking across china (whoa). sherry's in hong kong (aka heaven on earth) and having a great time. i'm... i'm doing stuff. articles are submitted and payments have been collected and apparently i'm a valuable secret diner participant. can't beat that with a bat. ha.
so i lied and said i was going to bed. i am, in a bit. i have another interview tomorrow, kind of a random thing that spawned from a phone call this afternoon. apparently the CEO from one of the companies i interviewed with about a century ago is in town and wants to meet me. wtf? whatever. i'll meet a CEO just to get out of the house. things are so random here. i basically am going in for an interview tomorrow about a position i don't know about and for a reason that is unknown and i'm still not sure what time i'm supposed to go. huh? i should really go to sleep.
had dinner with the kids at le saleya again. it was nice; it always is. we sat outside on the terrace despite the rain, under the rather mildewy awning. we were next to (and by that i mean nearly on top of, saleya is tiny) a couple - a nice french girl and her obnoxious boyfriend. i'm going to say he was from one of the countries formerly known as the soviet union. he said, 'fuck' about 1000 times - and i'm not one to judge since it's a favorite of mine, too, but he really said it a lot - and said some not-so-nice things to her. our whole table felt a little bad for her. alvin is still in love with the chocolate cake they make and that's pretty much why we go there. that and the wine list is pretty great and generally the food is pleasing. but those are silly reasons, right?
ok, i'm tired. nighty night.
so i lied and said i was going to bed. i am, in a bit. i have another interview tomorrow, kind of a random thing that spawned from a phone call this afternoon. apparently the CEO from one of the companies i interviewed with about a century ago is in town and wants to meet me. wtf? whatever. i'll meet a CEO just to get out of the house. things are so random here. i basically am going in for an interview tomorrow about a position i don't know about and for a reason that is unknown and i'm still not sure what time i'm supposed to go. huh? i should really go to sleep.
had dinner with the kids at le saleya again. it was nice; it always is. we sat outside on the terrace despite the rain, under the rather mildewy awning. we were next to (and by that i mean nearly on top of, saleya is tiny) a couple - a nice french girl and her obnoxious boyfriend. i'm going to say he was from one of the countries formerly known as the soviet union. he said, 'fuck' about 1000 times - and i'm not one to judge since it's a favorite of mine, too, but he really said it a lot - and said some not-so-nice things to her. our whole table felt a little bad for her. alvin is still in love with the chocolate cake they make and that's pretty much why we go there. that and the wine list is pretty great and generally the food is pleasing. but those are silly reasons, right?
ok, i'm tired. nighty night.
Tuesday, June 12, 2007
getting lost
cindy brought home a stack of dvds the other day, so now we have 'lost, complete thirdly season' running. i haven't watched the complete second or firstly seasons, so i'm pretty lost (har har), but i can safely say it's fuggin weird. watch it if you like cults and stupid bai ling acting like an exotic, overly sexed weirdo. poor bai ling, so typecast.
the fine recipient of yet another cold. i think this happens every month. i think some little fairy poured cement in my sinuses when i wasn't looking.
we decided to do some spring cleaning to rid our place somewhat of the many piles that have gathered. it's amazing how much crap you can accumulate here if you have even the slightest pack rat tendencies. just the free crap you get at all these random events is enough to make the landfills ache. and i discovered that we have a playstation!
okey dokes. sleepy time.
the fine recipient of yet another cold. i think this happens every month. i think some little fairy poured cement in my sinuses when i wasn't looking.
we decided to do some spring cleaning to rid our place somewhat of the many piles that have gathered. it's amazing how much crap you can accumulate here if you have even the slightest pack rat tendencies. just the free crap you get at all these random events is enough to make the landfills ache. and i discovered that we have a playstation!
okey dokes. sleepy time.
Monday, June 11, 2007
is AFI coming to shanghai or not?
currently listening to: aventura y monchy y alexandra
i can't figure out what the lineup is for earth live on july 7 at shanghai stadium. the promoters are fucking with me and leading me to believe that AFI might be in shanghai, which would be the equivalent of going to heaven on a first class train. i think they are not, tho. vegans can't exist in china.
went to a salsa class tonight. there were about 9 of us, and most of them were beginners, but it was such outstanding fun, anyway. i danced a lot with the teacher - some fanatic latin-dance german guy who's actually an engineer but moonlights as a dance instructor - and started learning how to lead, so i could dance with the girls. my first time learning to lead; it's such a good skill to have. i learned how to lead the hammerlock and inside and outside turns, which are basic, but something i've been needing to learn. the instructor kept referring to the moves in spanish (with a strong german accent), which throws me off because i only know the english (ballroom) terms for everything.
at the end of the class, he taught us the bachata, which is from the dominican republic. i think i've done it before in clubs, just didn't know what i was doing, but the music is friggin addicting. it's got this ping-y quality that i immediately became obsessed with, so i asked the instructor for some artist recommendations and i'm happily listening now. aventura and monchy y alexandra, for those who want to check them out.
the bachata is a simple 4-step side-to-side movement, but all we learned today was basic and left and right turns. dance classes could really stand to be three times longer sometimes. i think from now on i'm going to avoid studio classes and just go to the clubs. from what i've seen, the salsa classes at studios tend to cater to very beginners, and unless i'm highly invested in teaching a beginner to dance (a very willing beginner, ahem), i think i'd just have more fun in the clubs. however, there's something nice about being taught the basics in a small class environment and in a very regimented way. dots your i's, crosses your t's.
what else... spent the day writing this article. the salsa class was really more a cry for help - spending all day writing tends to sink me into a certain zone and mood where i can't properly socialize and spend too much time staring into space with my hands in my hair. cyn's the only one outside of my family that has seen me immerse in this self-depression in order to be productive, and i think i may have scared her a little, how distant i am. if i didn't before, i now understand why writers are such loners and tend to hole up in remote places in order to work on their stuff. you need solitude and, to a certain degree, you need to depress your own emotional state.
might try a tango class on wednesday. i did that one class in hong kong with allen, but it wasn't a proper lesson so i'd like to tackle it, conventional style.
getting sleepy... for once i'm attempting to go to sleep before 2 am, so here i go. night night, peoples.
i can't figure out what the lineup is for earth live on july 7 at shanghai stadium. the promoters are fucking with me and leading me to believe that AFI might be in shanghai, which would be the equivalent of going to heaven on a first class train. i think they are not, tho. vegans can't exist in china.
went to a salsa class tonight. there were about 9 of us, and most of them were beginners, but it was such outstanding fun, anyway. i danced a lot with the teacher - some fanatic latin-dance german guy who's actually an engineer but moonlights as a dance instructor - and started learning how to lead, so i could dance with the girls. my first time learning to lead; it's such a good skill to have. i learned how to lead the hammerlock and inside and outside turns, which are basic, but something i've been needing to learn. the instructor kept referring to the moves in spanish (with a strong german accent), which throws me off because i only know the english (ballroom) terms for everything.
at the end of the class, he taught us the bachata, which is from the dominican republic. i think i've done it before in clubs, just didn't know what i was doing, but the music is friggin addicting. it's got this ping-y quality that i immediately became obsessed with, so i asked the instructor for some artist recommendations and i'm happily listening now. aventura and monchy y alexandra, for those who want to check them out.
the bachata is a simple 4-step side-to-side movement, but all we learned today was basic and left and right turns. dance classes could really stand to be three times longer sometimes. i think from now on i'm going to avoid studio classes and just go to the clubs. from what i've seen, the salsa classes at studios tend to cater to very beginners, and unless i'm highly invested in teaching a beginner to dance (a very willing beginner, ahem), i think i'd just have more fun in the clubs. however, there's something nice about being taught the basics in a small class environment and in a very regimented way. dots your i's, crosses your t's.
what else... spent the day writing this article. the salsa class was really more a cry for help - spending all day writing tends to sink me into a certain zone and mood where i can't properly socialize and spend too much time staring into space with my hands in my hair. cyn's the only one outside of my family that has seen me immerse in this self-depression in order to be productive, and i think i may have scared her a little, how distant i am. if i didn't before, i now understand why writers are such loners and tend to hole up in remote places in order to work on their stuff. you need solitude and, to a certain degree, you need to depress your own emotional state.
might try a tango class on wednesday. i did that one class in hong kong with allen, but it wasn't a proper lesson so i'd like to tackle it, conventional style.
getting sleepy... for once i'm attempting to go to sleep before 2 am, so here i go. night night, peoples.
Sunday, June 10, 2007
all the cantos in the house...
so one of the 'attractions' at volar when we went on friday night was some beat-boxing phenom, killa kella or some nonsense like that. the flier literally said, 'world famous beat boxer in london!' the guy's world famous in london? apparently he's supposed to be decent, but all we heard him do was emcee. he kept asking where the ladies at, which is just annoying. he wasn't exactly onstage at a concert, he was standing in the dj booth (i.e. table) in the middle of the floor in a club. all us ladies had to laugh.
so today spent getting things done. met sherry at dlc for brunch, went to the stupid fabric market (ugh) for stuff to send with ross to jody in seattle, went to a hot class. then we went to hengshan cafe, which is a small chain (4 locations?) of restaurants that serve up canto food. dan came out at the end to chat w/ sherry and hand off cyn's old phone.
for us homesick cantonese spawn, hengshan cafe is heaven sent. and forgive me if this is some well-known spot that i'm noobing out on, but, well, whatever. i'm a noob. sherry and i ordered 4 dishes plus soup and just about polished everything off. plus dessert. when i say i am hungry, i mean it. rowr.
the stupid fabric market. i hate that place. it's like ripoff city... all the expats and/or tourists trolling the joint and getting sandbagged on prices. i mean, it's all relative, i know. and i have a coat that i adore that i had made there, which was so much cheaper than buying off the rack back home. i know. but that constant frenetic energy, the frisson of the hustle just permeates the place. you're treated like a total asshole because you're trying to give these places business. it's one of the experiences that makes me disgusted with this city.
hong kees have a certain prejudice (sherry and i were discussing) about shanghainese. hong kees are blunt as hell, but they're honest and just sort of put their feelings out there. the shanghainese, however, are known to be extremely 'tricky' (in my mom's words) or (in my words), conniving shitballs. i know there are lots of nice locals in this city, sure, but it takes one fucked up cab driver or one nasty fabric market vendor, and i want to fucking torch the place.
next time we're going to yuyuan where sherry's friends at the printshop say you can buy them wholesale and cheaper.
it's been over a week since i went to hot, so now i'm ready for a faceplant. plus it's past 3 am. whoops.
so today spent getting things done. met sherry at dlc for brunch, went to the stupid fabric market (ugh) for stuff to send with ross to jody in seattle, went to a hot class. then we went to hengshan cafe, which is a small chain (4 locations?) of restaurants that serve up canto food. dan came out at the end to chat w/ sherry and hand off cyn's old phone.
for us homesick cantonese spawn, hengshan cafe is heaven sent. and forgive me if this is some well-known spot that i'm noobing out on, but, well, whatever. i'm a noob. sherry and i ordered 4 dishes plus soup and just about polished everything off. plus dessert. when i say i am hungry, i mean it. rowr.
the stupid fabric market. i hate that place. it's like ripoff city... all the expats and/or tourists trolling the joint and getting sandbagged on prices. i mean, it's all relative, i know. and i have a coat that i adore that i had made there, which was so much cheaper than buying off the rack back home. i know. but that constant frenetic energy, the frisson of the hustle just permeates the place. you're treated like a total asshole because you're trying to give these places business. it's one of the experiences that makes me disgusted with this city.
hong kees have a certain prejudice (sherry and i were discussing) about shanghainese. hong kees are blunt as hell, but they're honest and just sort of put their feelings out there. the shanghainese, however, are known to be extremely 'tricky' (in my mom's words) or (in my words), conniving shitballs. i know there are lots of nice locals in this city, sure, but it takes one fucked up cab driver or one nasty fabric market vendor, and i want to fucking torch the place.
next time we're going to yuyuan where sherry's friends at the printshop say you can buy them wholesale and cheaper.
it's been over a week since i went to hot, so now i'm ready for a faceplant. plus it's past 3 am. whoops.
Saturday, June 09, 2007
one more question
...aimed at the guys, here. i've already talked to cyn and sherry and steph about this, and we've come to a singular conclusion.
can you think of any other reason that a male houseguest would leave your lotion in the shower?
be honest. i keep my lotion on the counter right next to the shower, so once you get out and dry off, it's right there. no reason to climb back into the shower to apply.
i mean, really. it's appalling.
can you think of any other reason that a male houseguest would leave your lotion in the shower?
be honest. i keep my lotion on the counter right next to the shower, so once you get out and dry off, it's right there. no reason to climb back into the shower to apply.
i mean, really. it's appalling.
some chick got hitched
cyn's looking at photos of a high school friend's wedding. it's funny to scroll through and see all the goofing around people do at weddings. this is much more fun than admiring the bride or the groom or flowers or whatever the hell else. mostly it's because we're sort of irreverent about the couple; i assume if you actually care about the people getting married, you pay a little bit of attention.
i think i'm lucky to be 29 and a girl and not really feel anything about getting hitched. i assume that when you meet the right person and you're ready emotionally, than you proceed accordingly. my mom's forceful reminders that she would like to see me knocked up as quickly as possible are unrelated to my unmarried status. she advises that i should just have kids out of wedlock. nice, mom. since i'm unemployed, now is a stellar time to think about kids.
no one in our close circle of friends is married, or even engaged. not even close, last i checked. we're all 28-31, happily bopping along: several in b-school, one doctor, one just finishing an MPP, a couple of slackers (me), one ph.D in comp lit, one in biotech, one architect, a lawyer, a couple kids running their family businesses. everyone's dating or whoring or something in between. once one falls, a few others will go quickly. it's inevitable. i am not looking forward to that day, although i'm not necessarily opposed to it, because i assume it will mean that one of my very good friends is really happy and is about to get happier. so on that rather simplified level, i can accept.
i mean lucky because i'm not there yet, and i don't want to wake up one day and feel like i need to be someplace i'm not. i've never been a goal-setter when it comes to things like that, and i get almost infuriated with societal pressures on women who hit 30. i have known far too many women who have become consumed with the idea that they're shitty, terrible, inadequate, lacking something, whatever, because they're over 30 and still single. i think it's bullshit. being single is not worse than being married, and is certainly not a negative reflection on anyone. if you're a lovely person in general, than chances are you're still lovely, regardless of age and ball-and-chain status. my aunt got married for the first time in her 50s, and she's giddy as all hell. everything in due time.
i had a boss, my first job out of college, who would refer to herself frequently as a 'spinster' and would sprinkle her conversation with self-depracating comments about how no one wanted her and that she was washed up. she even had a blown-up cartoon taped to her wall of a skeleton sitting on a bench, holding a purse, with the caption, 'waiting... for the right man.' i think she scarred me for life. i'd honestly never met anyone who so openly hated her life or herself, and it was friggin scary.
my mom doesn't pressure me about marriage. i'm not sure why, but i appreciate it. a lot of my girlfriends' moms do, openly, and sometimes not in a nice way. the whole grandkids thing is weird to me, coming from my mom. she's not particularly maternal, but i guess she does like to play with babies. i always thought, as a child, that my mom was too busy for her kids, but now that i've emerged somewhat from that petulant, self-involved childhood bit, of course i realize it was all for us. she's resorted to blackmailing my sister and i into having kids, but we don't succumb. she's instilled in us more strength than to fall for a silly trick like that. she's probably kicking herself now.
in other news... today spent spiraling in randomness. went and checked out the last dance studio on the list, so now i can sit my ass down and actually go about writing the article. met up with steph and her friend janet at a random art showing on fuxing lu. we spent about 45 seconds looking at the paintings and 1.5 hours drinking the free wine on the terrace. went over to 3 on the bund and strolled through the gallery on the third floor, where the art and the wine were much better. stalked the waiters and bumbled around the space, admiring some of the cooler pieces. met some intense fashion photographer named jeremy, who weirded steph out to the point where she excused herself to stare at a painting more closely. went to the weird place in the basement of 5 on the bund that replaced number five and had some fairly crappy bar food. albert and scott and a visiting friend joined us, then we headed to a rather outstanding yakitori place on shimen at nanjing.
instead of heading to pirates with everyone else, i elected to come home to drop off the laptop and change into something less daytime than a jersey skirt and my reefs. predictably, i'm still parked on the sofa. i don't have it in me to go all the way to xujiahui by myself to inhale lungfulls of smoke and drop another few hundies on drinks and taxi.
volar last night was lovely. really. nice scene, nice people, perfect cocktails, and you can't complain about the decor. but the cigars were killing me. there was one point when every inhalation felt like i was barbequeing my cilia. i could visualize the nice and healthy-pink tissues in my trachea withering and turning gray-black. ugh.
i think i'm lucky to be 29 and a girl and not really feel anything about getting hitched. i assume that when you meet the right person and you're ready emotionally, than you proceed accordingly. my mom's forceful reminders that she would like to see me knocked up as quickly as possible are unrelated to my unmarried status. she advises that i should just have kids out of wedlock. nice, mom. since i'm unemployed, now is a stellar time to think about kids.
no one in our close circle of friends is married, or even engaged. not even close, last i checked. we're all 28-31, happily bopping along: several in b-school, one doctor, one just finishing an MPP, a couple of slackers (me), one ph.D in comp lit, one in biotech, one architect, a lawyer, a couple kids running their family businesses. everyone's dating or whoring or something in between. once one falls, a few others will go quickly. it's inevitable. i am not looking forward to that day, although i'm not necessarily opposed to it, because i assume it will mean that one of my very good friends is really happy and is about to get happier. so on that rather simplified level, i can accept.
i mean lucky because i'm not there yet, and i don't want to wake up one day and feel like i need to be someplace i'm not. i've never been a goal-setter when it comes to things like that, and i get almost infuriated with societal pressures on women who hit 30. i have known far too many women who have become consumed with the idea that they're shitty, terrible, inadequate, lacking something, whatever, because they're over 30 and still single. i think it's bullshit. being single is not worse than being married, and is certainly not a negative reflection on anyone. if you're a lovely person in general, than chances are you're still lovely, regardless of age and ball-and-chain status. my aunt got married for the first time in her 50s, and she's giddy as all hell. everything in due time.
i had a boss, my first job out of college, who would refer to herself frequently as a 'spinster' and would sprinkle her conversation with self-depracating comments about how no one wanted her and that she was washed up. she even had a blown-up cartoon taped to her wall of a skeleton sitting on a bench, holding a purse, with the caption, 'waiting... for the right man.' i think she scarred me for life. i'd honestly never met anyone who so openly hated her life or herself, and it was friggin scary.
my mom doesn't pressure me about marriage. i'm not sure why, but i appreciate it. a lot of my girlfriends' moms do, openly, and sometimes not in a nice way. the whole grandkids thing is weird to me, coming from my mom. she's not particularly maternal, but i guess she does like to play with babies. i always thought, as a child, that my mom was too busy for her kids, but now that i've emerged somewhat from that petulant, self-involved childhood bit, of course i realize it was all for us. she's resorted to blackmailing my sister and i into having kids, but we don't succumb. she's instilled in us more strength than to fall for a silly trick like that. she's probably kicking herself now.
in other news... today spent spiraling in randomness. went and checked out the last dance studio on the list, so now i can sit my ass down and actually go about writing the article. met up with steph and her friend janet at a random art showing on fuxing lu. we spent about 45 seconds looking at the paintings and 1.5 hours drinking the free wine on the terrace. went over to 3 on the bund and strolled through the gallery on the third floor, where the art and the wine were much better. stalked the waiters and bumbled around the space, admiring some of the cooler pieces. met some intense fashion photographer named jeremy, who weirded steph out to the point where she excused herself to stare at a painting more closely. went to the weird place in the basement of 5 on the bund that replaced number five and had some fairly crappy bar food. albert and scott and a visiting friend joined us, then we headed to a rather outstanding yakitori place on shimen at nanjing.
instead of heading to pirates with everyone else, i elected to come home to drop off the laptop and change into something less daytime than a jersey skirt and my reefs. predictably, i'm still parked on the sofa. i don't have it in me to go all the way to xujiahui by myself to inhale lungfulls of smoke and drop another few hundies on drinks and taxi.
volar last night was lovely. really. nice scene, nice people, perfect cocktails, and you can't complain about the decor. but the cigars were killing me. there was one point when every inhalation felt like i was barbequeing my cilia. i could visualize the nice and healthy-pink tissues in my trachea withering and turning gray-black. ugh.
Friday, June 08, 2007
well, it's the end of the week
...and you know what that means. i slept for about an hour and a half last night, went to an interview, had a nice hour-long chat with the director of finance, ran some metrics for him, and chopped it up about tax laws in china versus the states. it was fun.
and now i'm watching endless episodes of grey's anatomy, waiting for sleep to hit so i can be worth a shit when we go out tonight. there are better ways to spend this time, had i slept. i could go to yoga. i could volunteer somewhere that needs non mandarin-speaking volunteers that can't tell her right from her left when barking at taxi drivers early in the morning, i could do something useful. but instead, i sit here, absorbed by fictional drama.
last night, despite needing sleep so that i could ostensibly rock mr. financial director's interview boat this morning, i lay awake, listening to snoring, wondering about what i will do if and when i return to work. as restless as i have been, as worried about money as i always am, thinking about going back to work stirs up anxiety. i'm afraid i'm going to look up one morning, riding on the metro next to someone with chernoble breath, or in a taxi stuck in traffic on a hot sticky day, and just want out again. what happens then?
i can hear you thinking. you just suck it up, right? no one wants to do the every day, they just do. people don't just quit their jobs and run to another country, hide from ex boyfriends or responsibility or the yoke of the mundaneness. people who do that are so very lucky to have the support systems or the money or both to indulge their compulsions. so i guess i'm a lucky, ungrateful, chickenshit princess-y type.
and now i'm watching endless episodes of grey's anatomy, waiting for sleep to hit so i can be worth a shit when we go out tonight. there are better ways to spend this time, had i slept. i could go to yoga. i could volunteer somewhere that needs non mandarin-speaking volunteers that can't tell her right from her left when barking at taxi drivers early in the morning, i could do something useful. but instead, i sit here, absorbed by fictional drama.
last night, despite needing sleep so that i could ostensibly rock mr. financial director's interview boat this morning, i lay awake, listening to snoring, wondering about what i will do if and when i return to work. as restless as i have been, as worried about money as i always am, thinking about going back to work stirs up anxiety. i'm afraid i'm going to look up one morning, riding on the metro next to someone with chernoble breath, or in a taxi stuck in traffic on a hot sticky day, and just want out again. what happens then?
i can hear you thinking. you just suck it up, right? no one wants to do the every day, they just do. people don't just quit their jobs and run to another country, hide from ex boyfriends or responsibility or the yoke of the mundaneness. people who do that are so very lucky to have the support systems or the money or both to indulge their compulsions. so i guess i'm a lucky, ungrateful, chickenshit princess-y type.
Monday, June 04, 2007
good morning
stellar article in the ny times today:
http://www.nytimes.com/2007/06/05/business/worldbusiness/05fakes.html?ex=1338696000&en=8b35898d39f700ad&ei=5088&partner=rssnyt&emc=rss
peeps in the times newsroom are really hammering at this. there's article upon article covering all aspects of the scandal. meanwhile us expats over here are trolling the FDA website for info on toothpaste, dog food, whatever, relatively nonplussed about the fish feed substitution, the melamine additives, the fake factory front. don't like being blase about stuff like this - it is serious and i'm not denying that - but it's just not surprising.
in other news... took a flow 2 class with bill yesterday. the only thing that got my ass up was the fact that it was bill and i'd only done hot with him before. what can i say? true to his reputation, and anyone that knows me well enough here knows that i'm his biggest fan. the first flow 2 class where i wasn't rolling on the floor with back spasms at the end, and although it kicked the shit out of me, i really liked it. of course. bill is somehow able to effectively communicate exactly what/where/how you need to hit, and the challenge just lays in getting there, not grappling with what the hell you're doing on top of how to execute, like my normal reaction to flow classes.
enough yoga head speak. i don't like sounding like one of the thousands of converted that roam around in stella mccartney lycra and jump on soapboxes at the slightest chance.
so i read this morning in perez that obama has his own reggaeton song? fuggin hirarious. he is, of course, courting the further left vote with his strong statement of opinion on gay/lesbian rights despite his own heavily christian beliefs, and going after the latino vote (hence the song). i have to say, every day that goes by convinces me that halle berry may have it right - obama '08. as a woman, i struggle with the hillary thing, but i think she plays the game too far in the middle and too highbrow and backstage-strategic for these times. obama's theme is 'hope,' which sounds kinda hokey initially, but you start to see why he chose it. as a child of post-mtv gen x, you're bombarded by hyperstimuli at every level. i talk about simplicity and purity all the time as if it's some unattainable goal, some figurative holy grail. sometimes a little hokiness speaks volumes.
i want to read his book. i think it's called the audacity of hope. i saw it in garden books a while back, but it's in hardback and i'm too cheap-slash-broke to spend money on things that don't involve vodka or transportation (kidding... kidding). i'm interested in a mixed-race senator running for president who grew up in hawaii and therefore has a sensibility about the mash of culture and an exposure to poverty. my indo friends also like to point out that he had an indonesian stepfather and lived in indo for a while. just the life history would be compelling, no?
http://www.nytimes.com/2007/06/05/business/worldbusiness/05fakes.html?ex=1338696000&en=8b35898d39f700ad&ei=5088&partner=rssnyt&emc=rss
peeps in the times newsroom are really hammering at this. there's article upon article covering all aspects of the scandal. meanwhile us expats over here are trolling the FDA website for info on toothpaste, dog food, whatever, relatively nonplussed about the fish feed substitution, the melamine additives, the fake factory front. don't like being blase about stuff like this - it is serious and i'm not denying that - but it's just not surprising.
in other news... took a flow 2 class with bill yesterday. the only thing that got my ass up was the fact that it was bill and i'd only done hot with him before. what can i say? true to his reputation, and anyone that knows me well enough here knows that i'm his biggest fan. the first flow 2 class where i wasn't rolling on the floor with back spasms at the end, and although it kicked the shit out of me, i really liked it. of course. bill is somehow able to effectively communicate exactly what/where/how you need to hit, and the challenge just lays in getting there, not grappling with what the hell you're doing on top of how to execute, like my normal reaction to flow classes.
enough yoga head speak. i don't like sounding like one of the thousands of converted that roam around in stella mccartney lycra and jump on soapboxes at the slightest chance.
so i read this morning in perez that obama has his own reggaeton song? fuggin hirarious. he is, of course, courting the further left vote with his strong statement of opinion on gay/lesbian rights despite his own heavily christian beliefs, and going after the latino vote (hence the song). i have to say, every day that goes by convinces me that halle berry may have it right - obama '08. as a woman, i struggle with the hillary thing, but i think she plays the game too far in the middle and too highbrow and backstage-strategic for these times. obama's theme is 'hope,' which sounds kinda hokey initially, but you start to see why he chose it. as a child of post-mtv gen x, you're bombarded by hyperstimuli at every level. i talk about simplicity and purity all the time as if it's some unattainable goal, some figurative holy grail. sometimes a little hokiness speaks volumes.
i want to read his book. i think it's called the audacity of hope. i saw it in garden books a while back, but it's in hardback and i'm too cheap-slash-broke to spend money on things that don't involve vodka or transportation (kidding... kidding). i'm interested in a mixed-race senator running for president who grew up in hawaii and therefore has a sensibility about the mash of culture and an exposure to poverty. my indo friends also like to point out that he had an indonesian stepfather and lived in indo for a while. just the life history would be compelling, no?
circle sauce
and yes, some introverts go clubbing 2-3 times a week. i don't go out every night. so ptthhhh....
Sunday, June 03, 2007
my mom is lecturing me
i'm on skype talking to my family. it's a rare day when my mom actually takes time out to speak with me, but when she does it's always topped off with a question about my drinking (yes, we still party 2-3 times a week) and a short lecture that ends with, 'your mom says stop drinking so much! so, listen to your mom!'
she likes to refer to herself in the third person.
i usually get a cat update from my sister usually followed by some sort of threat by my mom ('chiu wei-ah. i'm gonna get rid of your cat. she won't leave me alone!') and a lengthy discussion of how work is going, and some funny story about my grandma in her senile splendor (feeding my cat litter and cat cookies, hiding her toothbrush in the closet). today the liu village was over for a bbq and so i got the family dinner noise, which was nice. i miss my big, loud, insane family.
so hopefully my sister will come out to visit me in september, and my parents might holla in october. wouldn't that be grand?!
my friends at home keep asking when i'll be back for a visit. i feel like the general consensus for expats out here is that you should travel around asia while you're out here, but i feel like i'm going to need a dose of bay area at some point.
she likes to refer to herself in the third person.
i usually get a cat update from my sister usually followed by some sort of threat by my mom ('chiu wei-ah. i'm gonna get rid of your cat. she won't leave me alone!') and a lengthy discussion of how work is going, and some funny story about my grandma in her senile splendor (feeding my cat litter and cat cookies, hiding her toothbrush in the closet). today the liu village was over for a bbq and so i got the family dinner noise, which was nice. i miss my big, loud, insane family.
so hopefully my sister will come out to visit me in september, and my parents might holla in october. wouldn't that be grand?!
my friends at home keep asking when i'll be back for a visit. i feel like the general consensus for expats out here is that you should travel around asia while you're out here, but i feel like i'm going to need a dose of bay area at some point.
sometimes...
one wonders if bush is using his reputation for idiocy as part of a rather clever strategy for getting what he wants:
http://www.nytimes.com/2007/06/02/washington/02germany.html
on one (more dominant) hand, i really applaud merkel for her efforts in getting shit done and pushing the richest 8 countries to make a difference. on the other (and more cynical) hand, you gotta know that bush isn't going to sign on to the G-8 initiative because he's got big 'n dirty industries behind him. i mean, jesus, he comes from an oil company family. you think his cronies aren't pressuring him?
anyway, give a read and be aware of what bush is doing to sabotage the progress of the next G-8 meeting next week.
http://www.nytimes.com/2007/06/02/washington/02germany.html
on one (more dominant) hand, i really applaud merkel for her efforts in getting shit done and pushing the richest 8 countries to make a difference. on the other (and more cynical) hand, you gotta know that bush isn't going to sign on to the G-8 initiative because he's got big 'n dirty industries behind him. i mean, jesus, he comes from an oil company family. you think his cronies aren't pressuring him?
anyway, give a read and be aware of what bush is doing to sabotage the progress of the next G-8 meeting next week.
Saturday, June 02, 2007
re-hashing myers-briggs
a while ago i went through a personal and professional crisis (cringe. i hate using that word because it sounds so touchy-feely, but i gotta call as spade a spade) and decided to start searching for answers. i hated my job because it felt like i was a monkey punching keys and spending $9 million on random furniture while being closely watched by a big circus of control freaks. i loved my office and my colleagues and my former boss, but my new boss was showing definite signs of insanity and her boss would only encourage it since it drove performance. anyway. so i started doing things, researching, talking to people in other jobs, took the GMAT, whatever. i also took the MBTI (myers-briggs type indicator) to figure out what i might be happy doing. having never previously needed direction in life, it was really a strange place for me to be in to suddenly not have a grip on where i was going.
based on MBTI, i am an ISTP: introvert, sensing, thinking, perceiving. in my language, this basically means:
the second school of thought is that knowing your personality tendencies tends to pre-determine your reactions. you type-cast yourself as the introvert, so you find it ok that you don't make more efforts when with new people, when actually tonight you may have been okay with donning your social butterfly hat and acting outside of your norm. stranger things have happened. while i do find it incredibly important to know thyself (like the oracle says), i think it's equally important that you don't limit thyself through knowledge. do what you feel like doing sometimes. it's ok.
at any rate, had a recent conversation where i had to explain why i get so quiet and then tired in situations where i have to meet and chat with new people. i find it emotionally draining... and what a dramatic thing to say. but having to think about being intelligent and appropriate and funny and nice while trying to maintain eye contact and pay attention to the people you do know... my god. it made me recall my days where i would spend hours thinking about my personality type and obsessing over what i could do with my weirdo self. it sounded so self-involved and strange, coming out of my mouth, trying to explain why i couldn't go on to further socialize. i hadn't heard myself justify my shortcomings with a personality breakdown in such a long time.
i am grateful now for the space to let that go. my super-anal excel spreadsheet-waving alternate ego has subsided a little bit, and i can appreciate the different and less predictable things in life. this time is teaching me that now.
based on MBTI, i am an ISTP: introvert, sensing, thinking, perceiving. in my language, this basically means:
- Introvert: loner, driven by head-function vs. heart-function. tieger and barron-tieger put it this way: 'are energized by spending time alone. avoid being the center of attention. think, then act. think things through inside their heads. are more private, prefer to share personal information with a select few. listen more than talk. keep their enthusiasm to themselves. respond after taking time to think things through; enjoy a slower pace. prefer depth to breadth.'
- Sensor: trust fact vs. intuition, find value in the practical. more helpful citations from tieger & barron-tieger: 'tend to be specific and literal, give detailed descriptions, value realism and common sense.' on this spectrum, i am far less extreme and kind of sit in the middle, but i don't know how to splice that so i just went with sensor.
- Thinker: logic logic logic. apply logic instead of heart, frequently unable to appear compassionate because we're busy thinking of solutions or assessing the current problem. i tend to value finding an answer over empathizing with the affected person. sorry. apparently, 2/3 of males are thinkers and 2/3 of females are feelers. and saadiq questions why i think i'm a boy so much of the time. i am one!
- Judger: deadline-driven and responsible. i get to the airport so early that most times my flight hasn't even been posted at the gate. i am deathly afraid of missing deadlines. i focus more on finishing what i'm doing than wondering if the relevance of the task still applies. some friends call this ocd.
the second school of thought is that knowing your personality tendencies tends to pre-determine your reactions. you type-cast yourself as the introvert, so you find it ok that you don't make more efforts when with new people, when actually tonight you may have been okay with donning your social butterfly hat and acting outside of your norm. stranger things have happened. while i do find it incredibly important to know thyself (like the oracle says), i think it's equally important that you don't limit thyself through knowledge. do what you feel like doing sometimes. it's ok.
at any rate, had a recent conversation where i had to explain why i get so quiet and then tired in situations where i have to meet and chat with new people. i find it emotionally draining... and what a dramatic thing to say. but having to think about being intelligent and appropriate and funny and nice while trying to maintain eye contact and pay attention to the people you do know... my god. it made me recall my days where i would spend hours thinking about my personality type and obsessing over what i could do with my weirdo self. it sounded so self-involved and strange, coming out of my mouth, trying to explain why i couldn't go on to further socialize. i hadn't heard myself justify my shortcomings with a personality breakdown in such a long time.
i am grateful now for the space to let that go. my super-anal excel spreadsheet-waving alternate ego has subsided a little bit, and i can appreciate the different and less predictable things in life. this time is teaching me that now.
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