multi-currency account

only in this city do you get lured out after finishing yoga at 10 pm to laris with the promise of a free dinner, only for it to turn into multiple 'tokyo schoolgirls' at the vault on an empty stomach save for a handful of cashews and some stale cheese crisps with two executives of a shoe conglomerate and your two friends - one of whom is wearing the other's dress held up with a safety pin and her too-small sandals - after which you unknowingly wade through puddles of pink-tinged urine at arguably one of the nicest marble-lined restrooms in the city while wringing your hands in an OCD epileptic seizure over the lack of hand soap, then find yourself on the nanpu bridge at 2 am, almost crashing into a construction truck reversing into oncoming traffic after which you look over and see your taxi pass a motorized scooter (not a motorcycle) carrying a very blithely riding young couple holding their groceries in pink plastic bags on a major traffic artery.

only here do you accomplish that in one night.

do not miss the chance to blow

it shows up a bit dark, so i guess just have a listen

cindy decided on friday that saturday was karaoke night. DOPE. it may take a song or three to warm up, but everyone, and i mean everyone, warms up eventually when we go. last night was classic in that we ventured into new territory - rapping - thanks to both a competition between ben and kate for best emcee, and sherry taking over the song programmng.

who knew that shouting 'california love' could be such a bonding experience? sherry even found 'back to the hotel' by N2Deep, which of course the two bay area girls had to sing. i had that single on tape when i was in like, 5th grade. too fuggin funny. put the pedal to the metal back to the liquor store.

there were, of course, the slow jams being crooned to by the dozen, but we all agreed that it was the hip hop, not the power ballad, that drew everyone in and ensured we all had fun.

t, having declared himself a non-singer earlier in the night, was won over by 'creep' by radiohead (i saw him fall...) and he was soon shouting the lyrics just like the rest of us. some of us, of course, are far more emboldened than others by whiskey green tea and screwdrivers, so air supply and bette midler and TLC was a result of that. we were there until 5 in the morning. good times.

abbey road this morning for brunch. i was trying to avoid a typical carolyn by not ordering a super gimungous meal, and ended up disappointed. just do #79 - it's worth it. i put together my own breakfast with a la carte french toast (so sugary that it actually crunched between my teeth, *shudder*), one fried egg, and a basket of fries. abbey road has some fabulous french fries, even if their french toast sucks, so i couldn't resist, but next time i think i'll just go conventional.

t called the landlord today and we're still on for the 26th! still haven't been swindled yet, apparently. miracle, i think. i'm nervous and excited. my sister's going to help me move when we get back from bali (6 days and counting... whoot whoot!) but i'm still a bit apprehensive. like a baby bird venturing out on her own! my sister's arriving on thursday night - iso fun. already started thinking about which restaurants to go to and what to show her. i have to arrange my holiday time off, too. argh.

discontent

not sure why tho. left work at 7:30 after NO typhoon showed up all day - i was imagining the windows being blown open and the building shaking - and went to yogs. my favorite teacher of all time was teaching, had a great class, came home and there was a PUPPY waiting for me, ate salami and noodles (not together), and now i'm in bed feeling like today was shit.

maybe it was a salami overdose?

the store's starting to come together. most of the display setup will happen tomorrow night. i sure hope the peeps on friday like paper, because they're about to get a shit load! remind me to bring my camera.

i need to get a haircut, so i'm going to try and sneak out either during the day or after work so i don't drag around this sorry mess i've been sporting. sad! bedraggly!

sleep now.

more gems

from my cousin: "CK and I went to Costco this weekend and got your stuff. We had this one arm cashier who was just throwing shit around as he was scanning our stuff. It was pretty wild as if he needed to prove something to us."

lmao. what? that's just random.

typhoon widget or wikipedia or whatever the hell is hitting tomorrow. some naysayers have loftily informed us that it will only be a category 1 by the time it hits shanghai, but work sent an email around saying that we can choose to take tomorrow off and come in on saturday because of it. now that's legit, right?!

bailed on yogs tonight in favor of kimchi ramen in front of the tv. tired and actually rather concerned that if i didn't catch a cab at 8, i'd never be able to get one at 10:30 after yoga. tired... it was a 3 double-espresso day instead of the normal 2. i'd like to blame jetlag (italy's 6 hours behind) for it being so hard to get up in the morning, but really, it's always hard for me to get up in the morning.

may be a work-at-home day despite needing to be in the office for meetings (with colleagues and a boss who might not be there) and store setup for friday. you're coming, right?!?!?!

god i'm tired. smell ya later.

would you LOOK at that...

...the fund transfer went through already. for the uninitiated, still so much takes place in china in the form of cash, meaning that i'll be needing to hand over a friggin brick of bills to the landlord when i get the keys. again, i'll qualify that statement by saying, provided i don't get swindled. i'm excited but still halfway expecting that he's going to give the apartment to someone else despite signed contract in hand because they agreed to pay 150% of what i agreed on. in fact, let's just assume that's going to happen so i'll be pleasantly surprised if it doesn't.

now i only need to make about 8 trips to the atm over 8 days to get the money out. annoying.

back to work for the first time in nearly 2 weeks. i brought in the chocolate and yes, they were gone so quickly that i didn't have the chance to try one. a-ok, actually. ayi also came 'round with cut-up pieces of moon cake for us to have, which was nice. i wonder who thinks up all of these niceties for the office. the medicines in the cupboard, the cracker cabinet, the cut-up fruit in the afternoons. the pitcher she empties milk into (and constant refills because we're like fucking calves in a meadow we drink so much milk) for coffee.

i wrote my cousin an email about italy because she told me before i left, "I think it's so cool that you get to travel for the job. So you don't get to eat pasta or shop at Prada, you are in Milan. I love Italians!!! ... maybe you will have a hot weekend love affair with a HOT Italian stallion." lmao. what? if i had a dollar for every person that brought up an italian stallion when i told them i was going to italy, i'd have... maybe 4 bucks. still funny. i had to let her know that after my first 2 days in italy, i was really not loving the native peoples. after moving to a nicer hotel and finishing the gift show it was a lot better, but really. i mean, i wasn't expecting people to fall over themselves to serve me, but i certainly wasn't expecting china, italian-style. i actually get fewer looks here in china, which is saying something because my people fuggin love to stare. and they can smell a foreigner a mile away. and vice versa. (drum roll.)

not too much interesting to say today because i'm purposely avoiding talking about work. work is work, and i've lived through office politics for a long fucking time so i know how to navigate, more or less. but that doesn't neutralize the.... the only word i can think to use at this point is, fatigue. i'm fucking tired of it. it wore me out at w-s and i don't want it to make me start hating my job here. after a while it all smushes together and i can't differentiate between people who bother me and those who don't, and the only thing i think about in the morning on my way in to work is that i'd rather be doing anything else than going in. i don't want to be there again.

anyways.

my sister sent my this from her phone - scarlett sleeping on the leg of my parent's rottweiler-mix, lola. scarlett, whom my sister frequently refers to as 'fucking whore' or 'goddamn bitch,' apparently attacked lola's leg after the photo was taken in true scarlett style. i never made claims that she was nice.... and my sister isn't really one with cats. no one in my family took to scarlett after i abandoned her at my mom's house. she's combative and mean and kicks everyone's ass, which, i admit, is hard to love. i like a little personality, myself, over crappy obedient-but-dumb animals, but sometimes you have to kick her ass in order to avoid killing her. she's a fucking pain. i know it. my dad's first question when i told him about the apartment was, 'do they allow cats?'

things change so fast

got back friday morning... whew! just about 24 hours of traveling to get home, but made it in one piece. t came down from beijing on the overnight train and it was a fabulous weekend for all. went out for a few quick drinks at cotton's with everyone friday night, then hit the wall around 11:30 and came home and crashed.

saturday i was 40 minutes late to meet my realtor, which turned out to be fine because we ended up waiting another 20 minutes for the landlord of this apartment to show up. i had half a mind to leave, but good thing i didn't because i loved the place and signed a contract that day, after emergency phone calls to trev who ended up coming down and negotiating the whole thing anyway. it's really nice - i'm geeked. moving very very soon... just 2 days before my sister gets here! ooch. cutting it close. i can't believe it happened so fast - but after getting shafted on the last one, i knew i wanted it as soon as i saw it and there we go. provided i don't get swindled or whatever, i guess i'll be in a new place before the holiday...! a bit of anxiety there...


pretty, huh?

then we had a gang over for taco night - jase, kate, kate's friends ashley and hillary, of course t, and sherry eventually made it after huaihai was shut down for a parade and had to take the metro. i didn't eat myself sick this time, thank god. we had tons of beer and wine and then sherry showed up with vodka and blue cheese-stuffed olives and made martinis. i can't hang - martinis are vomitous and blue cheese ain't improvin anything in my book. but the blue cheese fans were swooning... kate and party brought over wine and beard papas. yummy.






i like kodi's pose the best

today was spent at a rib cookoff at the naked cow... rmb 100 got you 5 beers and all you can eat ribs. i thought there would be a catch, but no. an honest-to-god good deal in china that isn't fake and benefits charity? weird that it worked out. outside fun all afternoon and i have no mosquito bites to show for it. strange, no? i haven't gotten bitten since i've been back, which is really strange to me.

back to the grind tomorrow. must remember to bring the shit i bought for the office (yes, chocolate) plus the pounds of catalogs. a bit apprehensive for the windfall that i'm expecting.

nighty night.

you're my lover, not my rivaaaaaaaal

i've had karma chameleon stuck in my head all day, thanks to david from last night. today was successful. and by that i mean i blew enough cash to feel guilty (sure sign i've done the right amount of shopping) and have purchased gifts for the important people. i hope the airport sells chocolates or some shit that i can bring back for the office. chocolates in my office, i think like any and every office in the world, are wholly consumed in under 30 minutes of being left in the kitchen. the one thing my office-mates don't suck down in that amount of time is chocolate-covered espresso beans, which took nearly 2 hours to disappear. i agree - i love coffee more than most things, but i don't need to ingest the bean. nope nope nope.

i bought two pairs of very saucy shoes today. i'm sure people will think i'm nuts, but i love them and patent is so in for fall anyway.

the suit arrived, and it's all tailored and looks great. i'm happy. i may not be the best saver in the world, but at least i enjoy life, right? right.

just got back from another swim and another cooking session in the steam bath. i discovered the cold water shower head, which really makes a difference in the cooker. the towels were all used up though, so i had to walk out to the spa reception, dripping wet and probably red as a lobster, wearing my swim suit, to get one. the spa receptionist is the same one from monday night, and i think she must think i'm really a special person. and by that i don't mean really gifted. monday night i walked out what i thought was the exit and she had to chase after me, because it was really the door to the pool, which i had just come from so i'm sure she was baffled as to why i thought it led to an exit. er...

i think i'm going trail mix again for dinner. it's 10:30 here so there's no chance i'm wandering my ass out to find food. i need to pack and sleep anyway. have to be at the airport at 7:30 tomorrow morning. oh yay.

kisses.

lights out

...charlie brown. yesterday was a me day and today was definitely a company day. i spent the morning at a vendor's showroom in the fashion quarter, learning about their brand, image, design concept, etc. and then at lunch we drove to the brianza region to visit the headquarters and the factories. wearing 3-inch heels was necessary but not pleasant. it was bad enough that i wasn't in a suit, but i think everyone got over that.

just got back from a lovely dinner and lots of wine with the vendor, and a long ride back to milan. well, not that long. the driver was obsessed with 70s disco and 80s music, so he blasted culture club and ABBA and sang for me 'just an illusion' by imagination, all the while lecturing me on how music now doesn't exist and that everything is just a re-make of disco. i managed a wan smile and nod before completely losing consciousness, owing to complete exhaustion from the day and a bottle of locally-produced wine.

tomorrow i get another me day before heading back to the pollution that is shanghai. unbelievably, my eyes have been incredibly irritated this whole time in europe, which is inarguably much less polluted than china, but i have a theory that my eyes are so used to the airborne crap in china that clean air is actually resulting in the said irritation. wouldn't that be fucked up?!

i have a huge headache - likely from the wine - and have developed a theory (another one, i'm full of them) that italians are severely dehydrated. the whole day and only at 5 pm did someone think to offer some water. that mentality coupled with the espresso intake and the sun exposure... i can only imagine italian insides that are parched and desperate for hydration. i have taken to carrying around this enormous bottle of water with me, but left it behind today believing that italians - like the dutch - would be offering me beverages every 5 minutes. not so. fend for yourself in this country!

tomorrow, the duomo and some gift-buying. per usual, i have worshipped at the church of prada and the temple of armani, but even i feel pangs of guilt over having not seen something old and steeped in history. plus, i can't come back from italy without gifts, although the euro is mean to us RMB-ers. very very mean.

off to bed in my high threadcount sheets on my king-sized bed. yes, i am unapologetically materialistic. wouldn't be doing what i am doing if i wasn't.

going to bed

three happy things today:

moved to hotel chedi.
http://www.hotel-milano-the-chedi.com/

purchased one very expensive suit. dark gray.

purchased one very expensive perfume, hindu grass.
http://www.nasomatto.com/

i swam some laps after getting mad at air france and showered in the spa, then steamed myself in the turkish bath (fancy talk for steam room). wrapped in a big bathrobe and still mad at air france, but tired enough to not care and smelling like my new perfume which smells so unlike me i can't believe i bought it, but i can't stop sniffing myself so i guess that's a good thing - normally i'm of the very clean-scent persuasion. what the hell is hindu grass anyway? whatever. when you smell me and you're all bowled over and shit... you'll understand.

off to bed i go. so many things left undone - fedex package on its way to my old hotel, ticket still for friday not thursday, pants not ironed. ugh. i just want to go to sleep and hide. for dinner i had a lovely version of trail mix that i handily put together from the little market in the metro near my old hotel. i'm too tired to seek out dinner. my suit will deliver to the hotel wednesday morning, hopefully all tailored to fit. i really hope it fits and the pants are long enough.

*sigh*

pleasantries

being all by myself, all my free time (usually spent consuming food or beverage) is spent people watching. in the grand tradition of mankind, i'm starting to draw broad generalizations about our italian brothers and sisters. none of them mean anything in the slightest, of course.

1. italian women do not embrace their natural hair color. i believe that i have not yet seen an adult female with her own hair color. it's either jet-ass black, streaked with some otherwordly shade, burgundy, or platinum blonde.
2. italian men have lots of style, but i've drawn up a derivative of the style formula: extremely slick sunglasses, to be worn at all times of the day or night in any social configuration; very nice leather or suede shoes; an adventurous sense of pattern on dress shirts; either closely shorn hair or longer, windblown-looking hair; fearlessness in wearing white jeans and plenty of accessories; a very nice bag in either briefcase or messenger style.
3. everyone has a tan. not just sprayed with tanner at the salon kind of tan. a deeply bronze tan that makes me think i'm in india. there will be hell to pay when they get older.
4. italian women, much like brazilian women, are not any better-looking or more nicely-shaped than american women. they are simply much more prone to dressing younger, wearing heels 24-7, showing skin (even if it's baked and sagging from years of sun exposure - see #3 above), and wearing lots of perfume.
5. italians may be weirder than americans. and this comes from a girl who lived in san francisco, a city where i was stopped at a light once, looked over, and saw a woman on one of those small, superfast japanese motorcycles, wearing a helmet that she'd decorated with furry cat ears and a tail. yesterday i was sitting and people-watching towards the end of the day, and a group of people walked down the breezeway of the exhibition. one woman was dressed like she worked at the gap and was sporting an enormous neck brace. another woman was wearing an evening gown (i kid you not) and sparkly high heels, and carrying a chihuahua. keep in mind we were all at a trade show.
6. everyone smokes. everyone. i swear to god i saw a pregnant woman taking a drag on a cigarette yesterday. in the US - especially in the pretentious bay area - you'd get yelled at by total strangers.
7. italians are down with the swine. during lunch at the 'buyers club' that i'm allowed access to, nearly every dish involved a smoked or preserved pork product. it was like heaven - essentially prosciutto or speck or guanciale in any and every form. and americans are the fat ones? mind boggling. italians also find booze to be an important part of lunch. i concur.

thank god i got out of apparel at an early age and suckered into home furnishings. out of boredom yesterday, i wandered into the pavilions that housed the 'costume jewelry and fashion accessories' vendors. first thing i discovered was that this is where all the asians in the joint were hiding. find me a tacky accessories show and i'll find you my people. second thing i realized was that tastelessness sees no cultural or ethnic boundaries. after a few aisles, i realized that people were staring at me because i kept walking by booths and snorting out loud. after that, i kept my snorts to myself, but really, thank god i don't need to track trends in the apparel world. home furnishing contains some tacky shit, but somehow its less personally offensive when it's for the home, not meant to be worn on the body. if i had to sift through the metric tons of total shit just to find that one cool thing for a living... i mean, really. crocheted 'tibetan' backless clubbing tops?

italians also don't give a shit about you. not that i expected to be embraced by total strangers walking down the street, but really. i mean, even people you ask for help essentially tell you to fuck off. and then they laugh in your face. what? if i wasn't so tired all of the time from scouring their stupid show for cool shit, i'd care. i slept for 11 hours last night and woke up feeling like... i could sleep for 11 more. i want to see the duomo and go to corso como tomorrow, but i have half a mind to order room service and pass out. not really, no. if there's shopping to be done, i'll do it. but damn. i never thought my first trip to italy would be so lacking in ethusiasm. on my part.

sleepy and sleepless

in milan. amsterdam was a whirlwind of walking to appointments avoiding bikes and trams in the cool air (yay), having meetings with creative people and pretending to know what i'm talking about, and piercing sunlight. the sun is much brighter when the air is clean.

i had a lunch meeting with a brazilian woman who manages a very famous designer's work (names remaining nameles thanks to the miracles of google). we had lunch to discuss future partnership, but it seemed she was already set to agree with what we wanted (just by me showing up? i don't know. she'd been so cautious over email) and eager to talk about other things in life. i don't know if she took a liking to me or if she liked to talk (i think the latter, but we did get along well), but we had a really fascinating conversation about the dutch and their calvinistic viewpoint on life, on what she wants to do in her career, on the state of china, on where we imagined raising families... it was interesting and odd and we sat out on the terrace of this cafe overlooking a canal. after lunch she showed me a hidden convent sanctuary in the middle of central amsterdam, and then she walked me back to my hotel.

KLM food is so much better than China Eastern, or United, for that matter. On my way over we had some meal that was catered by South Beauty, and I think it was the best airplane meal I've ever had. I'd even slept through the meal service, but the guy saw that I was awake and served me up a tray. And yes, I'm preaching about the goodness of airline food, I think mostly because that's what I've lived off of in the past 36 hours.

Up at 5:30 this morning thinking about stuff. I still am not sure if I'll be here a week or just through the weekend. The next three days are about to be killer, walking a show 8 - 9 hours a day and hustling people for info in the evenings. If you saw the list of covert objectives I was given, you'd call me double-0... 0. That would make me triple 0. Work can be so political at times. And space cadet is here to execute? It makes you wonder about the state of things.

Anyway, I'm starving and I have to up in 30 minutes. Why am I wasting time blogging? Because that's what I do.

'so you gonna marry her?' 'yeah, probably.'

crazy.

working home right now. i have a deadline and i can't do shit at the office. too noisy and people keep bugging me.

leaving for amsterdam tomorrow. 2 days, then 5 days in milan. oh how the winds have shifted. hopefully my stupid wireless card on my stupid thinkpad won't act up. me with no company credit card, no international calling ability, and a half-broken laptop. i think finance actually expects me to carry around a wad of euro to make it through the week. lol. crackheads.

need to finish this. big squeeze and kisses.

WHAT a long day

whew! and we're back... well, i'm back. cindy's still in zhuhai, hanging with pops.

flew in this morning with alvin. wow. remind me never to do that again. fly home in the morning, i mean. it was fine, i rolled in around 1 pm and worked a full day so it was productive enough, went to all my meetings, made it through my inbox, etc. etc. fine. but god i'm tired.

may be heading to milan on friday for a home acc show. my first time in italy, so i'm not complaining, but i won't be strolling in a piazza, eating with mario batali, and buying armfuls of prada and missoni. more likely i'll be walking the show for a day and a half and spending the rest of the time in meetings. yay! but hey, like i said, i'm not complaining. if work keeps you interested, than it's a good thing. take it from the burnout baby.

hk was good, just way too short. landed friday night, met jen and cindy out for drinks, then back to allen's place for a shower and some work. cindy and i stayed up till 3-ish, and i passed out on the couch and dragged my ass up the next morning to meet biann and alvin in mongkok. we wanted to look at phones; alvin's pretty much decided on the prada phone, and i fell in love with the blackberry pearl, but after an enlightening convo with a salesguy about smartphone coverage on the mainland, that quickly fell to the wayside. still not sure what's going to happen, but i have 4 more weeks and then i can land an international phone account and i guess maybe reconvene at that point. with myself, i mean. there will be no hiding from work calls when that comes down the pipe, tho. i will be unhideable. not that i hide... from... my boss...

i did get to have lunch at tsui wah (oh heaven of heavens) and alvin and cindy and i all met my family out for a good canto dinner later. i trolled for shoes the whole day, but didn't see anything that struck my practical side and my whimsical side. cannot walk to work in heels, as much as i try. managed to hit up most of causeway bay for what i needed and squeezed in a little IFC after dinner, just to check out lane crawford's personal care and gifting area. didn't find any new brands for us, tho, but they do have a brilliant visual merch team in that IFC store. love.

what else... went to jen's new pad for a second dinner/bbq. june showed up, visiting from seoul, with bf and friend in tow.all good fun. i just met june but i really enjoy how strong her personality is. she's just... herself. it's kind of offensive at times, and really blunt, but i appreciate honesty far more than diplomacy so it's just pure entertainment. jen has this fuggin amazing deck that just about doubles her square footage and was genius enough to buy these rocking chairs with nice soft cushions to sink into. several glasses of wine and champagne later and i rocked myself unconscious, carefully coated in mosquito repellent and exhausted. shopping can be killer.

zhuhai is interesting. driving along a highway parallel to the water i could squint my eyes and almost pretend i was in waikiki driving from the airport. the water is dirty as hell, but there are interesting rock formations along the beach and really lush hillsides. quite nice. we spent far too little time there, saw the house - all 4 stories of it - and spent the later afternoon playing in the pool like otters. awesome! it's one of the nicest backyard pools in that its long enough to do actual laps, and leaves enough room in the yard for plenty of landscape. i had a ball. the fun really began when we all went to take showers, as no window coverings were up yet and all the showers are essentially against walls of windows. i showered in the dark (it's actually pretty fun, try it sometime), but i'm sure the neighbors enjoyed the show regardless. we thought it was pretty hilarious. cindy's dad got home around 8-ish and took us to an amazing dabino dinner. gotta love the hotpot! we ate ourselves sick, and cindy's dad broke out his johnnie walker blue label and we had beers and it was jolly.

a nice weekend. i'm pooped.

work was fun today - my projects are starting to come together and we got our samples back for the gifts we'll be giving out at the anniversary party and they came out really nicely. i'm happy with them. i really have to say, there's a satisfaction that comes with identifying with the positioning of your brand. it's nice to know that your work and your eye and taste count for something other than a cute wardrobe (can i even say i have one of those any more?), even if it's just small things. touches, really. all i need now is to get into a decent apartment and i'll be feeling - as the oracle says - right as rain.

sigh. nighty night. i'm glad to be home, even if shanghai is the ghetto country dirty weak-imitation version of hong kong.

xoxo.

hitting stride

got cancelled on to see the apartment i've been dying to see for the past 48 hours. how cruel. so instead met up with kayi, followed her around to a number of classical-music cd stores (i'm taking my dad to these places when they come visit, fuxing and fenyang, remember that), then we finally stuffed down some food and thought about what to do. i really just wanted to come home, throw some things in a bag and fall asleep, but we went to pecha kucha instead where we saw practically everyone we know in the city. who knew that artsy fartsy events were such a draw? kayi was sugarmommying me the whole night, so she kept the wine supply going whilst the 13 speakers they had lined up did their thing.

the pecha kucha thing was held at the sculpture space. surprisingly good outdoor space, given the crapity crap location. it almost actually felt like a real museum. we decided we need to hold a hide-and-seek or musical chairs event there.

today was much cooler than it has been. i don't know if i'm finally adjusting to the heat or what, but i remember thinking it was absolutely stifling until well into november last year. is that possible? i wore a sleeveless shirt to work and spent the entire day wrapped in my pashmina.

off to hk tomorrow. how excited are we?!

stranger danger!

watching 'blades of glory' with jase and cyn. we had taco night tonight, what a great thing! we can't believe we hadn't thought of this before. it's about to be on like donkey kong. just you wait.

two bottles of pinot later and we're all good... well i am, at least. yawning my way through stupid powerpoint for friday and some gifting ideas for later.

tomorrow i'm looking at apartments after work..! i'm excited, although i probably shouldn't be considering my past two excursions. also need to pack for the weekend. i have mad shit to do so laptop should go with, but really really don't want to do anything vaguely productive. just want to hang out and eat and see the fams and think about nothing. so we shall see. i'm a work bitch but i'm not a total sellout. maybe. hopefully.

still yawning.

i got to pick the wines for our events lined up this fall. isn't that hilarious?! no, really, i'm not that bad, but we have a white wine-only policy because (obviously) of the furniture, and that i know a lot less about. not that i know anything. ever.

i wonder what it is about booze that makes you want to make out with people. i mean, getting sleepy, yeah, i get it, inhibiting reflexes, ok, yeah, kinda goes with the sleepy thing. but making out?! grabbing ass? where does that come from? the grape? the must? the skin? the seeds? is there a chemical makeup that induces this?

boys

this almost isn't for me. entirely. it's just kinda for my girls, the girls, all girls... and me.

i like to refer cryptically to shit like, 'life hits you with shit when you're least expecting it,' whatever. most of the time these comments - duh - refer to what's going on with the boys, in my life, in my friends' lives. i think that i think about it more here in stinkytown vs. back at home because everything - especially the boys - move so much faster. rapid-fire. can't ever claim that fools here waste time.

with the thoughts of one semi-brokenhearted friend haunting me today, i've been spending a lot of time thinking about this particular subject, in between meetings and proposals and stupid work shit. i won't say that i don't get boys, because i do. sometimes. (hint: they're generally bigger and dumber than girls.... and smellier.) i don't honestly think i'm that different, or that any girl is, although there are definitely some commonalities, generalizations one can draw across gender lines. sure. socially-designated, whatever you want to attribute it to (yes, i know that was a fragment). i think anyone with a logical head on her shoulders and half a brain can reason through why people do what they do. it's difficult to fathom, to digest, to accept, and therefore to understand why someone doesn't call you back, or why he's spacing out seeing you with staying at home picking his ass (or so he says), or why he talks daily to his ex. boys do all sort of stupid shit - girls do it, too. we've all cheated and been cheated on and had overlap and got dumped and dumped and were with someone for way too long and in love with the wrong person. we've all done this. why don't we pick up on our own behaviors when we were the ones cheating or lying or making excuses and apply it to the one we're in now? why not just skip all the pining and the heartache and the emotion? it fucking sucks and then it's all over and you feel like an idiot. it ranges from mild annoyance to the world is crashing down around you and you feel like your skin is on fire and that you might vomit.

i like to use logic to avoid emotion, personally.

cyn always has to remind me that people don't work that way. most don't, anyway. they're not robots. emotions make you super stupid. you feel giddy and that warm, weird, nervous excitement builds up when you're pulling into the driveway of his apartment and suddenly you're willing to do the most ridiculous things. there's someone out there for you that you absolutely will fall in love with, a person that you think about so much that you can't wait for the end of the work day until you can see him, someone who loves you more than life, a person you can see yourself with for a long time. we have to know this. but you can't proceed on that plank if you don't let reason and logic go, even if it's just a little bit at a time. sometimes you just have to have faith in risk and love and that this person is going to treat you like you want to treat him. and most times, you're so fucking wrong, but sometimes you're right and everything falls into place and his face appears in your head when you're outlining fourth quarter strategies to a room full of people.

it's the oddest thing.

so, to crystalize (oh... corporate lingo. we're back) my stupid rambling (how many times have i written 'stupid' in this entry?), i don't want anyone to be sad about the incongruencies of your life versus some dumbass guy you really like. as much as you want to hate him, he's probably a good person - he better be or you have issues - and something just isn't in the cards right now for you two. timing, as we all know, is a bitch. and unfortunately it's one of the biggest driving factors in relationships. so maybe the timing was off, maybe that's a far-too-universal explanation for him being an asshole, maybe you're the asshole, maybe the timing was great but he's annoying and smells bad, maybe he doesn't speak nicely to you, maybe he's in love with you but you coulda had a V-8. who knows. life is incredibly messy and for those of us that have happily married parents, we know this better than anyone. (tangent: to have a marriage that lasts longer than you are old, people have to become freakish co-dependents and they have to grow together like a tree graft until one can't survive without the other. that's a bad metaphor, but let it go.)

something and someone else will happen, and this will pass. you have us and we loves you.

*snore*

shout out to our katie pie heading back to canuckistan (as jason puts it) tomorrow. we'll miss you while you're gone... vaseline and pepto or no.

met katie pie and cyn and jason out for dinner at element fresh, ready to fall on my face. actually, ready to fall on my face the whole day. not sure why, probably having to do with no exercise, drinking, and overeating several days in a row.

talking to trev in beijing now... bed soon. night!

falling victim

....to so many things. lapsing on my writing shouldn't be one of them.

the past two weeks have been a study in social saturation, gearing up for sending trevor off to beijing, trying to find that life-work balance, trying to understand how things are working in my head. shit hits you when you're least expecting it - that i have learned in these 29 years.

trev dropped me off at the shangri la on the way to the airport, where steph, marc, albert, drew, scott, and sherry were for brunch. i was going to skip - deadlines loom for my article, there's sleep to be had all over the place, and another day of food insanity wasn't what i needed after a week of failed attempts to go to yoga - but i decided to be social over being productive and showed up. i'd seen scott the night before at constellation so i got called out for wearing the same clothes he'd seen me in last night - oops - and still lugging around the laptop and the stuff i bought at h & m with sherry yesterday... but coffee arrived and we went prancing around and assembled the most finely-curated buffet meal ever!

ok, i'm exaggerating, but it was good and the shangri la has a chocolate fountain extravaganza where we went buck wild with the fruit and profiteroles and nougat-on-a-stick and crazy gummi candy bar that you can raid and stuff the fruit of your labors home in small orange boxes they provide. cool, huh? besides a dark chocolate fountain there's a milk chocolate fountain, a white chocolate fountain, and this weird green-tea (chocolate?) fountain to dip everything into. we went a little ape shit.

last night, as we left constellation at around 3 am, as we walked to the end of the road to find taxis and this woman dressed in a bizarre housecoat and sunglasses is striding past us and glaring. she stands in the middle of the intersection with her arms crossed, facing us, completely glaring. we were all expecting a kung foo hustle-esque superpowered lung expulsion to send us flying backwards, but instead she started scolding us, accusatory - 'you're learning bad things!' trevor answered her and she looked at him, 'i'm not talking to you. i'm talking to them' - indicating sherry, cyn, and me. 'they're bad eggs!'

i guess it was a pro-chinese thing because we were three chinese girls with three white guys who all happened to be our friends, but to the ignorant i guess it could seem that we'd landed us some foreigners to buy us out of our miserable existence or something. it was so crazy tho. in our cab a couple of minutes later we passed her, still stomping angrily down the street. at 3 am.

my day yesterday started off with sherry and a whole tableful of dim sum at crystal jade. we ate until we were ill and then ordered xiao long bao to top it all off. h & m visits are never fun after a huge meal, but i found stuff to buy anyway. feeling guilty about not spending trevor's last dinner with him, i went instead to thai house, which lives up to its reputation of excellent food and is even worth walking past the Most Rank Garbage Pile in Shanghai. experienced the slightly-fermented north east thai sausage, which was fascinating but greatly improved by the addition of thinly sliced raw garlic and sauce rolled up into a lettuce leaf. met up with trev and boys at the spot, where every foreigner in the city appeared to be gathered for a complete lack of air conditioning and some random soccer game. we later switched to the mansion and sat out on the terrace - outstanding - and then wandered over to constellation at around 1 am.

and now i sleep.

kickin like chicken

http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?f=/c/a/2007/08/15/DD2QRFBK1.DTL&hw=ways

sound like me? sorta does, actually. never realized how chatty i am with... myself.

good balance day. lots of busy stuff at work, left at a decent hour to meet up with sherry and the boys at TBB, then back home by 9 for more worky stuff and i'm in bed by 11:19, blogging. the only thing missing was my yoga goal but i'll handle that tomorrow.

i think i pissed the pseudo-singaporean off today by calling his ass out in a meeting in front of our boss. i didn't even do anything off-color; just clearly delineated my stance and his (not necessarily in opposition in my eyes, but he saw differently) and guess who won. thank you. it wasn't even a competition, and i don't even roll like that, but start trying to back my ass into a corner and make me look stupid eventually leads to confrontation. i suppose. i don't like to start shit at work and i like to think i'm generally cooperative, but damn. this fool's tried some really classic power-trip chain-yanking on me, just like the movies. it's funny. as in ha ha. whatever.

so our friend gregor's assistant at the bar is this chick with some bodacious ta tas, i think i've brought her name up before. she's got some striking cheekbones and long hair and these boobs pushed up to her throat, plus she usually sports really plunging necklines and tight-ass clothes. i don't blame all the dudes for staring; in fact, i'm probably worse than they are because i know what actually goes into pushing the girls up day in and day out (ouch). i think it's gotten to the point where i just say hi and have a brief conversation with her boobs. i clearly bade them goodbye tonight. wtf? i'm being such a pervert; but really, they're unstoppable. you can't NOT stare. and i see them probably 3 times a week! jason and trev's friend scott swung through for happy hour and when she walked by not only did the whole table get whiplash (most of whom see her with me about three times a week) but i think scott nearly fell out of his chair. she's that type of girl.

sherry and i split a burrito tonight and i have to say it wasn't half bad. the "carnitas" were significantly better than the boiled meat at nyc deli, altho i ain't talkin shit because they make me happy usually twice a week. i'm just sayin...

last night was interesting. i should actually be drafting an article right now, some restaurant review i got pulled to write, ostensibly because i'd either write a favorable review, a well-written review, or i'm just known in the city as willing to give good reviews for free food and free cocktails all night long. but god, i'm tired. the food last night was actually some of the best japanese i've had in the city. the best, i would say, having not yet tried a couple of major destinations. we had some really good fish, tho. and the other courses (6 en totale) were pretty damn good. then we proceeded to the dessert parlor and had 5 desserts. literally. and a few desserty cocktails. i was not complaining.

anyways. i'm passing out. love love love. and for you bitches out there trekking in patagonia while i'm breathing toxic fumes and eating shite - free will notwithstanding - just know that i wish i was you right now. tired as hell.

here we are, vegetarians again

so it's been a while! what you you been up to? i've been garbage heap hunting (oh sorry, i mean apartments) aka discovering the worst that shanghai has to offer. it's been real. i thought san francisco was expensive, but at least you get a relatively standard floorplan and the presence of squatters is conspicuously absent. and there's no overturned wheelbarrows full of old electronic devices on what would be your stove. but you know, i'm just a spoiled american.

ok ok, it hasn't been that bad. but i'm sort of boggled baffled quietly dismayed that apartments in em-effing chi-to-the-mothafuggin-ah are so pricey. i mean, jesus. i just spent an inordinate amount of money on a year's worth of yoga classes. you'd think i'd have some friggin buying power, or at least get to pretend that i do. nope.

what's been up... i stopped to think the other day (friday?) and realized that i'd had drinks or been relatively drunk every night for over a week... of course i realized this over drinks i think, but i stopped. tonight. oh wait, no, i didn't. but i'll stop tomorrow. wait, no i won't. i only had one tonight and it had more to do with the tomato juice than wanting the vodka. i think. maybe. anyhoo. tomorrow i have some free meal booked as a tradeoff for my writing skills so inevitably there will be some drinks involved, but wednesday is all me. me me me and no booze and yoga after work and all that good stuff.

we were sitting around that fake lake next to xintiandi on saturday night (sherry's badcat picnic by the lake) and there were all these fairly large bird-like items swooping around. i thought they were oversized insects because of their light, fluttery movements, but general consensus is that they were bats. so i turned to albert and asked if bats were lighter than birds. apparently this is a really random question because he immediately started laughing and couldn't stop. i find this to be a normal topic of conversation, but apparently it's not. people laugh at you. hysterically almost. it was like a conversation you have when you're stoned... except we were drinking beers and eating coppa with baguettes, not sparking one-hitter-quitter.

anyways.

the melatonin is kicking in and the past 9 days are catching up with me. i'm getting lectures about doing cardiovascular activity, registering my domain so that my china folkies can read my shit, and all with my eyelids falling. i had bolognese tonight. i'm so tired and i need to check airfares for hong kong.

so i'm thinking just damnnearnocturnal.com. what do you think?